Unusually Stupid Americans

Unusually Stupid Americans
Title Unusually Stupid Americans PDF eBook
Author Kathryn Petras
Publisher Villard
Pages 305
Release 2007-12-18
Genre Humor
ISBN 0307417611

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A hilarious collection of lists, statistics, news items, quotations, and facts detailing stupid acts of Americans from all walks of life—by the authors of the bestselling The 776 Stupidest Things Ever Said Everyone knows that America is “the land of the free and the home of the brave,” but sometimes that means we’re free to be as bravely stupid as we want! In Unusually Stupid Americans, Kathryn Petras and Ross Petras assemble choice bits of stupidity, U.S.A.-style, including •the top seriously flawed American advertising moments, including Pacific Airlines’ brilliant “You’re scared of flying? So’s our pilot!” ad campaign, which led the airline to bankruptcy within two months of the campaign’s inception •the Martin Luther King, Jr., celebration in Florida, where a plaque was un-veiled that was intended to honor the actor James Earl Jones but instead read, “Thank you James Earl Ray for keeping the dream alive” (an unfortunate slip-up, as James Earl Ray was King’s assassin) •and much more!

Unusually Stupid Celebrities

Unusually Stupid Celebrities
Title Unusually Stupid Celebrities PDF eBook
Author Kathryn Petras
Publisher Villard
Pages 274
Release 2009-04-22
Genre Humor
ISBN 0307498492

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The Greeks honored Zeus, the Romans revered Juno, but modern civilization worships a different sort of god: Celebrity. Face it, we follow the stars’ every move, fashion choice, and deliciously dishy affairs. Now Kathryn Petras and Ross Petras, authors of Unusually Stupid Americans, pull the demanding divas, screwball stars, and celebu-twits off their pedestals–and prove it doesn’t take a degree in rocket science to become famous. Cases in point: • Courtney Love misses an important court date relating to “possession of a controlled substance” because she can’t find a professional bodyguard at the last minute. • Mariah Carey’s entourage includes a skirt-from-touching-floor specialist, a towel hand-off person, and a professional drink holder/lifter. • Savvy traveler Paris Hilton concludes that all of Europe is, “like, French.” • Mensa candidate and rocker Tommy Lee is pretty sure that Winston Churchill was president during the Civil War, that the numeric equivalent of pi is “the two-equals-MC-squared thing,” and that an isosceles triangle is “somewhere in Bermuda.” Feuds, faith, family, money, sex, tantrums, travel–no star-studded stone is left unturned. Filled with jaw-dropping anecdotes, quirky quotes, and special stupid-celebrity awards, Unusually Stupid Celebrities provides a red-faced glimpse of the red carpet.

Unusually Stupid Politicians

Unusually Stupid Politicians
Title Unusually Stupid Politicians PDF eBook
Author Kathryn Petras
Publisher Villard
Pages 306
Release 2009-03-12
Genre Humor
ISBN 0307498506

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Kathryn Petras and Ross Petras, bestselling authors of the scathingly funny Unusually Stupid Americans and Unusually Stupid Celebrities, now set their bipartisan sights on the hallowed halls of the United States government. Unusually Stupid Politicians exposes the mind-boggling but true political mishaps, missteps, and miscues that have even the savviest spin doctors shaking their heads and saying “No comment.” Sections include • Extreme Hairsplitting–such as when Florida governor Jeb Bush, after being accused of hiding in a closet from rampaging Democrats, denied the allegation completely, stating that “it was actually a boiler room” • Brilliant and Innovative Ideas from The Pentagon– like their groundbreaking "Gay Bomb," their "Bad Breath Inducing" halitosis weapon and their plans to enlist The Three Stooges in the fight against terror. • Creative Political Excuses——such as “I just discovered I’m Jewish and it’s a Holy Day,”——used by Senator George Allen, who, after learning of his Jewish heritage, got out of a Senate hearing to “observe” Yom Kippur • The Most Egregiously Large Political Egos–measured in standard Chuck Schumer Ego Units (CSEUs) This hilarious and eye-opening exposé gives awards for “How I Blew My Campaign” and “Worst Campaign Ad,” and shares a list of candidates “endorsed by God,” as well as a list of those who lost because of Satan. So turn off C-SPAN and quit text-messaging congressional pages–you’re about to learn what the definition of “is” is.

Stupid Americans

Stupid Americans
Title Stupid Americans PDF eBook
Author Edd Petree
Publisher
Pages 83
Release 1971
Genre Americans
ISBN

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Idiot America

Idiot America
Title Idiot America PDF eBook
Author Charles Pierce
Publisher Anchor
Pages 322
Release 2010-05-04
Genre Humor
ISBN 0767926153

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NATIONAL BESTSELLER The three Great Premises of Idiot America: · Any theory is valid if it sells books, soaks up ratings, or otherwise moves units · Anything can be true if someone says it loudly enough · Fact is that which enough people believe. Truth is determined by how fervently they believe it With his trademark wit and insight, veteran journalist Charles Pierce delivers a gut-wrenching, side-splitting lament about the glorification of ignorance in the United States. Pierce asks how a country founded on intellectual curiosity has somehow deteriorated into a nation of simpletons more apt to vote for an American Idol contestant than a presidential candidate. But his thunderous denunciation is also a secret call to action, as he hopes that somehow, being intelligent will stop being a stigma, and that pinheads will once again be pitied, not celebrated. Erudite and razor-sharp, Idiot America is at once an invigorating history lesson, a cutting cultural critique, and a bullish appeal to our smarter selves.

Cruel and Unusual Idiots

Cruel and Unusual Idiots
Title Cruel and Unusual Idiots PDF eBook
Author Leland Gregory
Publisher Andrews McMeel Publishing
Pages 289
Release 2009-06-15
Genre Humor
ISBN 0740792091

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Some wonder why and some wonder why not. But it's the latter ones who make you scratch your head and say, 'What in the world were you thinking?'" Former Saturday Night Live writer Leland Gregory skewers cruel crooks and the idiotically inane. From absurd 911 calls to presidential philosophizing and political pandering to foolish felons, Leland Gregory generates the best laughs by exposing the worst of human nature. Inside this collection, Gregory offers more than 275 accounts of human stupidity at its most malicious and peculiar: * In August 2006, 40-year-old Darrel Rodgers was treated at a Bloomington, Indiana, hospital for a self-inflicted gunshot wound to his left knee. Rogers explained that he shot himself seeking to relieve the pain in his knee, which probably stemmed from shooting himself in the same knee ten years earlier. * And, because some of the stories are just that unbelievable, each anecdote, quote, or factoid is presented with relevant background information--including its verified news source.

Stupid American History

Stupid American History
Title Stupid American History PDF eBook
Author Leland Gregory
Publisher Andrews McMeel Publishing
Pages 274
Release 2009-04-21
Genre Humor
ISBN 0740793543

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New York Times Bestseller: Welcome to the land of the free, the home of the brave—and, apparently, the dumb, bizarre, and gullible . . . Did you know that . . . *John Tyler was on his knees playing marbles when he was informed that Benjamin Harrison had died and he was now president of the United States *For reasons still unknown, Texas congressman Thomas Lindsay Blanton, a Presbyterian Sunday school teacher and prohibitionist, inserted dirty words into the Congressional Record in 1921—for which his colleagues officially censured him by a vote of 293-0 *Two US presidents were indentured servants—and one of them ran away and wound up with a $10 reward posted for his capture From Columbus to George W. Bush, the bestselling coauthor of America’s Dumbest Criminals leads us through the many mythconceptions of our nation’s history in this lively book, exposing lots of entertaining moments of idiocy and inanity along the time line.