The government provides manuals for new home-owners and new motor vehicle operators, but what's a new superhero to do? Ka-POW! The Government Manual for New Superheroes rushes in to save the day! The Government Manual for New Superheroes is a hilarious, mock-official handbook that offers thorough, accessible, and completely zany advice for anyone who has always dreamed of donning a skintight spandex uniform and leaping across the rooftops of their cities. Going well beyond tights and capes, this manual provides insight into choosing a name, constructing a costume, choosing the right supertools of the supertrade, establishing a base of operations, maintaining a secret identity, taking or becoming a sidekick, joining a superheroic team, and even finding that special someone who gives meaning to a superhero's life--a nemesis. Extra features include a roster of superhero unions, a registration application, several useful charts and tips, and even a list of other government-sponsored periodicals for further reading. Destined to become a cult classic, The Government Manual for New Superheroes is an essential guide for every aspiring superhero.

The comedic duo behind The Government Manual for New Superheroes is back, and this time they've brought their magic wands and enchanted artifacts. The Government Manual for New Wizards is a hilarious, mock-official handbook for wannabe witches and warlocks who need advice on recognizing the onset of wizardolescence, understanding the laws of magic (and the magic of laws), choosing (or being chosen by) the right magical items and enchanted artifacts, dealing with the dead (grateful and otherwise), successfully hosting magical exhibitions, and the proper care and feeding of magical creatures. Wands, charms, cloaks of invisibility, shoes of stealth (or sneakers), and other otherworldly accoutrements--it's all here, discussed tongue-in-cheek but with the utmost Governmental authority. This entertaining guide offers such sage advice as: * A demon is just as afraid of you as you are of it--provided, of course, that you are eight feet tall, composed of living fire, and capable of destroying a small village with a single angry thought. Otherwise, it doesn't find you frightening at all. * When selecting educational programs, do not be tempted by solicitations from wizardry parchment mills. A so-called degree from such a place is not worth the scroll on which it appears to be inscribed. The ink will disappear not long after the school itself does. The Government Manual for New Wizards is a sidesplitting spoof of all things wizard-y.

There be no callin' 'dibs' in piratin'. Booty be divided among the crew, from the lowest deckswabber to the highest masthand. So says the Pirate Code." --Calico Jack Rackham, king of the pirates * Enjoy a witty mock-official handbook for potential pirates and plunderers. Matthew David Brozik and Jacob Sager Weinstein continue to spoof those uber-utilitarian survival and how-to guides by offering this pithy pirating primer for budding buccaneers. This treasure trove of Pirate Code imparts wisdom on eye patches and tricorner hats, talking the talk, walking the walk (down the plank, that is), appropriate ship names, dueling, avoiding cursed treasure, and much more.

Designed for public librarians, school media specialists, teachers, and anyone with an interest in supporting teen literacy, this book features 133 nonfiction booktalks to use with both voracious and reluctant teen readers. These booktalks cover a wide and varied range of nonfiction genres, including science, nature, history, biography, graphic novels, true crime, art, and much more. Each includes a set of discussion questions and sample project ideas which could be easily expanded into a classroom lesson plan or full library program. Also included are several guidelines for classroom integration, tips for making booktalks more interactive and interesting, and selections for further reading.

This tongue-in-cheek parenting book is a hilarious parody of every fear-mongering, crazy-making pregnancy and parenting manual parents have ever cringed over.

Evildoers, Take Heed! Justice has a new face, and it wears a mask. Who are we talking about? Ordinary folk like Mike McMullen, a.k.a. The Amazing Whitebread, who become something entirely new and occasionally borderline pathological: Real-Life Superheroes (RLSHs). "Being a singing superheroine is a way for me to not only pay the bills, it also helps me give the baddies such a headache." --Danger Woman Complete with costumes and all the gadgetry they can afford from selling old copies of Action Comics on eBay, RLSHs dish out their own brand of justice--while criminals go about their business and law enforcers roll their eyes. "Me and Shadowhare were walking past a bank and we stopped to make a phone call. As soon as we started walking away, the police came up and said, 'Do you know why we stopped you? Because you guys are wearing masks standing in front of a bank.'" --Mr. Xtreme McMullen spans the country, coach class, seeking to develop his own RLSH identity and address such weighty issues as: Sidekicks: Faithful wards or CPS bait? Bad Guys: Where the hell are they all hiding? Super-tights: How snug is too snug? So don your mask, suck in your gut, and join us. "Hey, you're with a superhero. . .what could go wrong?" --Geist, the Emerald Cowboy Michael McMullen, a.k.a. The Amazing Whitebread, was born in Wichita Falls, Texas. He earned an undergraduate degree in history and philosophy, and subsequently took the only employment option open to someone with the resultant lack of marketable skills: government service. He's worked as an intelligence analyst for the U.S. Department of Justice for just over a decade and currently lives in Arlington, Texas, with his wife, Lauren, and their children, Grant and Gracie. His hobbies include aspiring to get some woodworking done, thinking about learning a musical instrument, and trying to get interested in any computer game other than Text Twist. He has had short pieces published in various science fiction/fantasy magazines and currently holds the record for "Worst-Kept Secret Identity."