Would you Adam and Eve it? Over a hundred years after it was first heard on the streets of Ye Olde London Towne, Cockney rhyming slang is still going strong, and this book contains the most comprehensive and entertaining guide yet. Presented in an easy-to-read A to Z format, it explains the meaning of hundreds of terms, from old favourites such as apples and pears (stairs) and plates of meat (feet) to the more obscure band of hope (soap) and cuts and scratches (matches) through to modern classics such as Anthea Turner (earner) and Ashley Cole (own goal), as well as providing fascinating background info and curious Cockney facts throughout. Also included are a series of language tests so that readers can brush up on their newfound knowledge on their way to becoming a true Cockney Geezer. All in all, The Ultimate Cockney Geezer's Guide to Rhyming Slang is well worth your bread and honey to have a butcher's.

Silver Prize winner, 19th Annual Mature Media Awards, National Media (Book) division.Defining the differences between run-of-the-mill old farts and the loveable geezer, this hilarious tome for old men illuminates what they need to embrace geezerhood. Tools for recognizing different types of geezers--from the golfer to the hypochondriac--help men identify what type of cranky old man they are, and geezer role models and great geezer moments offer inspiration for who they can ultimately become. Offering daily insights into geezer philosophies and tips for locating popular geezer stomping grounds, this must-have gift for grandpa also includes crosswords, puzzles, and ""New Yorker ""cartoons he can enjoy from the comfort of his own recliner.

You only need to look at the story of Samson and Delilah to see just how important a man’s hairstyle can be. Thankfully, A Geezer’s Guide to Mullet Maintenance and Combover care is guide to selecting, growing and maintaining a stylish, comfortable and well-groomed hair helmet. Including: manly grooming tips; a breakdown of barnets to try out, such as the Curtain Cut (try to look like Johnny Depp; try not to look like Worzel Gummidge) or the Quiff (try to look like Alex Turner from the Arctic Monkeys; try not to look like Nick Grimshaw); a perambulation through hirsute history; a rundown of famous hair aficionados, from Albert Einstein to Paul McCartney via Adolf Hitler; hair and hairstyling records (can you beat the Longest Time Hanging by your Hair record?); the most ridiculous names for hair salons (Crops and Bobbers vs Shear-N-Dipity). The perfect gift for every man: from the metrosexual to those who just want to progress from their mum’s bowl cuts; whether he wants to learn how to carefully calm his cowlick or skilfully shine his skinhead.

People never learn. They make the same mistakes generation after generation. So here are the things that everyone should learn about life, then hope to remember. With a wry sense of humour, Rules for Ageing presents the most realistic, practical, pleasurable and, most importantly, painless advice you will ever receive. This book offers timeless advice for anyone still young enough to learn, and richly amusing reflections on life for those who have seen it all before.

From his youth in the cattle-covered Sandhills of Nebraska to a small French farming village, Dennis Glaser is enjoying an ever-changing, experience-filled life. And he here recounts some of those experiences to entertain and inform his readers. Writing with a rare combination of wit and wisdom, Glaser discusses life, love, laughter, nature, pets, work, and travel as essential elements of the well-lived existence. The universe covered within these pages is drawn from the lessons he has learned from growing to manhood to present daynot retired, he says, but re-wired. Glasers vignettes utilize a reporters insightful observation of events and the profiles of the people involved. The locales include small towns, big cities, and the rural countryside where he learned natures lessons first hand. Always he writes with an unerring ability to find the essential heart of each experience. Glaser exemplifies advice he received early-on: Find a job you love and youll never work another day in your life!

Based on Big Nerd Ranch’s popular iPhone Bootcamp class, iPhone Programming: The Big Nerd Ranch Guide leads you through the essential tools and techniques for developing applications for the iPhone, iPad, and iPod Touch. In each chapter, you will learn programming concepts and apply them immediately as you build an application or enhance one from a previous chapter. These applications have been carefully designed and tested to teach the associated concepts and to provide practice working with the standard development tools Xcode, Interface Builder, and Instruments. The guide’s learn-while-doing approach delivers the practical knowledge and experience you need to design and build real-world applications. Here are some of the topics covered: Dynamic interfaces with animation Using the camera and photo library User location and mapping services Accessing accelerometer data Handling multi-touch gestures Navigation and tabbed applications Tables and creating custom rows Multiple ways of storing and loading data: archiving, Core Data, SQLite Communicating with web services ALocalization/Internationalization "After many 'false starts' with other iPhone development books, these clear and concise tutorials made the concepts gel for me. This book is a definite must have for any budding iPhone developer." –Peter Watling, New Zealand, Developer of BubbleWrap