A first-ever how-to book to help abusive men change their behavior by changing their thinking. End the cycle of abuse - for good. Authors Charlie Donaldson, Randy Flood and Elaine Eldridge uncover a proven action plan that violent men can use to change their behavior. Filled with insightful questionnaires and actual case histories, the essential how-to book Stop Hurting the Woman You Love, will help end abusive patterns in favor of healthier, happier relationships.

"Providing practical tools and exercises, counselor Darby Strickland shows how anyone can recognize clues suggesting abuse, identify oppressive behavior, and work with a victim to bring clarity, help, and healing"--

The world-renowned therapist and author of the groundbreaking self-help classic, The Emotionally Abusive Relationship, delves into the most destructive and powerful weapon of the abuser: shame. And reveals its most powerful antidote... In The Emotionally Abused Woman, therapist Beverly Engel introduced the concept of emotional abuse, one of the most subtle, yet devastating forms of abuse within a relationship. Now Engel exposes the most destructive technique the abuser uses to break our spirit and gain control--and guides readers on how to free themselves from the shame that can keep them from the life (and the love) they deserve. Emotionally abused people are gradually stripped of self-esteem, dignity, and humanity--making them feel unworthy and utterly powerless to escape. But they possess a potent tool with which to combat shame: self-compassion. In these pages, Engel shows how to access it. Using her highly effective Shame Reduction Program, she helps readers jumpstart the process of recovery by offering specific steps to help heal, regain self-confidence--and ultimately become empowered enough to leave--for good. An invaluable resource for both men and women who suffer from emotional abuse, as well as therapists and advocates, Escaping Emotional Abuse is a supportive, nurturing guide for anyone seeking to break the chains of shame, and gain the emotional freedom to create healthier, lasting relationships.

Tens of thousands of children are removed from home each year due to some form of child maltreatment, usually physical neglect, physical abuse, or sexual abuse, although sometimes for emotional abuse as well. An additional significant number of children are victims of child maltreatment but remain in their home. Extensive research reveals the far reaching and long lasting negative impact of maltreatment on child victims, including on their physical, social, emotional, and behavioral functioning. One particularly troubling and complicated aspect is how the child victim forms (and maintains) a “traumatic bond” with his abuser, even becoming protective and defensive of that person despite the pain and suffering they have caused. This book will provide the reader with the essential experience of understanding how children make meaning of being maltreated by a parent, and how these traumatic bonds form and last. Through an examination of published memoirs of abuse, the authors analyze and reveal the commonalities in the stories to uncover the ways in which adult victims of childhood abuse understand and digest the traumatic experiences of their childhoods. This understanding can inform interventions and treatments designed for this vulnerable population and can help family and friends of victims understand more fully the maltreatment experience “from the inside out.”

"Engel doesn't just describe-she shows us the way out." -Susan Forward, author of Emotional Blackmail Praise for theemotionally abusive relationship "In this book, Beverly Engel clearly and with caring offersstep-by-step strategies to stop emotional abuse. . . helping bothvictims and abusers to identify the patterns of this painful andtraumatic type of abuse. This book is a guide both for individualsand for couples stuck in the tragic patterns of emotionalabuse." -Marti Loring, Ph.D., author of Emotional Abuse and coeditor of The Journal of Emotional Abuse "This groundbreaking book succeeds in helping people stop emotionalabuse by focusing on both the abuser and the abused and showingeach party what emotional abuse is, how it affects therelationship, and how to stop it. Its unique focus on the dynamicrelationship makes it more likely that each person will grasp thetools for change and really use them." -Randi Kreger, author of The Stop Walking on Eggshells Workbook and owner of BPDCentral.com The number of people who become involved with partners who abusethem emotionally and/or who are emotionally abusive themselves isphenomenal, and yet emotional abuse is the least understood form ofabuse. In this breakthrough book, Beverly Engel, one of the world'sleading experts on the subject, shows us what it is and what to doabout it. Whether you suspect you are being emotionally abused, fear that youmight be emotionally abusing your partner, or think that both youand your partner are emotionally abusing each other, this book isfor you. The Emotionally Abusive Relationship will tell you how toidentify emotional abuse and how to find the roots of yourbehavior. Combining dramatic personal stories with action steps toheal, Engel provides prescriptive strategies that will allow youand your partner to work together to stop bringing out the worst ineach other and stop the abuse. By teaching those who are being emotionally abused how to helpthemselves and those who are being emotionally abusive how to stopabusing, The Emotionally Abusive Relationship offers the expertguidance and support you need.

“Anyone who had a troubled childhood ought to read this book.”—Anne H. Cohn, D.P.H., Executive Director, National Committee for Prevention of Child Abuse Do you have trouble finding friends, lovers, acquaintances? Once you find them, do they dump on you, take advantage of you, or leave? Are you in a relationship you know isn't good for you? Are you still trying to figure out what you want to do when you grow up? Are you drinking too much, eating too much or trying to numb your pain with drugs of any kind? These are just a few of the problems abused children experience when they become adults. You may not realize you were abused. You may think your parents didn't mean it, didn't know better, or that others had it much worse. You may not even have made the connection between the past and your current problems. Outgrowing the Pain is an important book for any adult who was abused or neglected in childhood. It's an important book for professionals who help others. It's a book of questions that can pinpoint and illuminate destructive patterns. The answers you discover can lead to a life filled with new insight, hope, and love. “The best book available to help survivors cope and understand.”—Dan Sexton, Director, Childhelp's National Abuse Hotline “An invaluable aid for adult survivors of child abuse.”—Suzanne M. Sgroi, M.D., Executive Director, New England Clinical Associates

Severe abuse often occurs in settings where the grouping, whether based around a family or a community organisation or institution, outwardly appears to be very respectable. The nature of attachment dynamics allied with threat, discrediting, the manipulation of the victim's dissociative defences, long-term conditioning and the endless invoking of shame mean that sexual, physical and emotional abuse may, in some instances, be essentially unending. Even when separation from the long-term abuser is attempted, it may initially be extremely difficult to achieve, and there are some individuals who never achieve this parting. Even when the abuser is dead, the intrapsychic nature of the enduring attachment experienced by their victim remains complicated and difficult to resolve. This volume includes multiple perspectives from highly experienced clinicians, researchers and writers on the nature of the relationship between the abused and their abuser(s). No less than five of this international grouping of authors have been president of the International Society for the Study of Trauma and Dissociation, the world's oldest international trauma society. This book, which opens with a highly original clinical paper on 'weaponized sex' by Richard Kluft, one of the foremost pioneers of the modern dissociative disorders field, concludes with a gripping historical perspective written by Jeffrey Masson as he reengages with issues that first brought him to worldwide prominence in the 1980s. Between these two pieces, the contributors, all highly acclaimed for their clinical, theoretical or research work, present original, cutting edge work on this complex subject. This book was originally published as a double special issue of the Journal of Trauma and Dissociation.