For the first time, all in one place, the award-winning books, "A Trip to the Hardware Store & Other Calamities," and "I'm Not Talking About You, Of Course," PLUS seven bonus essays. If this doesn't make you smile, then you're not even trying! In A Trip to the Hardware Store, you'll explore such quirky topics as disastrous home repairs, an unfortunate dinner party, the truth about lazy people and the weird life of a debt collector. In I'm Not Talking About You, Of Course, you'll find humorous insights into important topics such as annoying pet people, analyzing your inner child, and just how much damage can be caused by a sneeze. In A Smidge Of Crazy, you'll find stories about annoying ads, about figuring out what door that extra key opens, what it means to have stamina, and why it is just so hard to focus when you have the attention span of a gnat.

A ridiculously funny essay collection, blending satire and personal stories to explore the absurd and yet very regular experiences of one millennial woman as she attempts to navigate racial identity, gender roles, workplace dynamics, and beauty standards. Birth control. Body hair removal cream. Boobs. It's all weird . . . but normal. This insightful essay collection from brilliant essayist Mia Mercado is about how all the things we think make us weird are actually quite normal, and all the rituals we blindly follow are actually really weird--from expecting women to wear uncomfortable shoes that make them taller (but not so tall as to scare straight men) to buying a $25 candle that smells like an ocean that doesn't exist. As a biracial woman living in the Midwest, Mia is intimately familiar with the more awkward aspects of being a person today. Whether offering advice on how to ask about someone's race, reflecting on how to quit a job that compels you do shots of whiskey on your lunch break, or coming to terms with her religious childhood while feeling spiritually seen in the skincare aisle at Target, Mia takes readers along as she brilliantly unpacks what it means to be a beautiful, professional, horny, cute, gross human, with essays including: Depression Isn't a Competition But Why Aren't I Winning? My Dog Explains My Weekly Schedule Mustache Lady White Friend Confessional Treating Objects Like Women With sharp humor and wit, Mia shares the awkward, uncomfortable, surprisingly ordinary parts of life, and reveals why it's strange to feel fine and fine to feel strange.

quirkyalone (kwur.kee.uh.lohn) n. adj. A person who enjoys being single (but is not opposed to being in a relationship) and generally prefers to be alone rather than date for the sake of being in a couple. With unique traits and an optimistic spirit; a sensibility that transcends relationship status. Also adj. Of, relating to, or embodying quirkyalones. See also: romantic, idealist, independent. Are you a quirkyalone? Do you know someone who is? Do you believe life can be prosperous and great with or without a mate? Do you value your friendships as much as your romantic relationships? Do gut instincts guide your most important decisions? Are you often among the first on the dance floor? Coupled or single, man or woman, social butterfly or shrinking violet, quirkyalones have walked among us, invisible until now. Through the coining of a new word, this tribe has been given a voice. Meet the quirkyalones. Read about: The quirkyalone nation: where we live, what we do Quirkytogethers (quirkyalones who have entered long–term relationships) Sex and the single quirkyalone Romantic obsession: the dark side of the quirkyalone's romantic personality Quirkyalones throughout history (profiles in courage)

In real life, Stevens is a professor at Stanford University. But for a year and a half, he worked in the admissions office of a bucolic New England college known for its high academic standards, beautiful campus, and social conscience. Ambitious high schoolers and savvy guidance counselors know that admission here is highly competitive. But creating classes, Stevens finds, is a lot more complicated than most people imagine.

A collection of humorous insights into important topics ranging from being targeted by annoying ads ("Nowhere to Hide"), to resorting to symbols when you've forgotten your words ("At a Loss for Words"), to figuring out what door that extra key opens ("My Extra Key"). Other essays examine how sitting is the new smoking (whatever that means), what it means to have stamina, and why it is just so hard to focus when you have the attention span of a gnat.

"The 25th- anniversary edition of this best-selling guide gives students simple strategies to maximize the opportunity to "tell us about yourself." Updated to reflect the experience college applicants face today, this book provides a clear path to an essay that says, "Pick me!""--

Winner of the "Indie Book of the Day" award, this short collection of humorous essays explores such quirky topics as annoying pet people ("I'm Not Talking About You, Of Course"), analyzing your inner child ("Irrational Fears") and how to live like the Amish in the aftermath of a hurricane ("A Jolt of Electricity"). Included are also stories of just how much damage can be caused by a sneeze ("It All Started with a Loud Sneeze"), why it is so complicated to buy a tube of toothpaste ("Ask Me No Questions"), how not to prepare dinner ("Martha, I Let You Down"), making new friends ("Friends in Low Places"), how a parent's obsessive hobbies can become an inescapable vortex ("Crazy Hobbies"), and why spending the night in a sleep clinic is like being abducted by probing aliens ("Nightmare at the Sleep Clinic"). If you don't see yourself in one of these entertaining essays, then I'm not talking about you, of course...