Frankly Frank says... The original ground breaking 'The Bollocks People Tell You' struck a mighty blow against all those so called 'experts' - life coaches, gurus, swamis, TV cooks, politicians, celebrity authors and faceless nobodies desperate to ram their knob head opinions down anyone and everyone's throat. However, the fight goes on - there are still mounds of grubby little tapeworms spreading their unwanted and nauseating opinions into every nook and cranny of our lives and I, Frankly Frank, promise not sleep until they are dispatched back to the invidious wormcasts they came from. It still seems that if we don’t measure up to their impossibly tedious 'ideals' of endeavor or health and safety or 'citizenship' or 'family values' that our very existence is squalid and hollow. Therefore it still remains for me to make the world a better place by shoving these self-styled 'experts' ideas and opinions up their respective asses. The good news is that we are not alone – there has already been a nationwide campaign involving much bloodshed of experts and the like so relax, flop into a lazy boy with a brace of burgers and a crate of special brew or sink into a hot bathtub with a truffle and caviar pasty and be assured once again that a murderous number of ‘experts’ were severely mutilated in the making of this book. * Here then is the fervently awaited definitive, all-encompassing follow up anthology ... More Bollocks People Tell You

Frankly Frank says... Just thinking about all those so called 'experts' - life coaches, gurus, swamis, TV cooks, politicians, celebrity authors and faceless nobodies - desperate, to ram their knob head opinions down my throat makes me want to spew. There is no area of life left without some grubby little tapeworm smearing its unwanted and nauseating opinion into it. The bastards cheerfully inform us if we don’t measure up to some impossibly tedious ideal encapsulated in some bullshit celebrity ‘save the plankton’ type book or Government ‘fuck responsibly’ type pamphlet our miserable existences are an insult to mankind's eternal struggle to distinguish itself from the primordial slime it came from. The only real certainty is that the world would be a better place if all these self-styled 'experts' shoved their endless opinions up their respective asses. However, as this is unlikely to happen, without a nationwide campaign involving much bloodshed, glide instead into a chaise longue with a glass of Chardonnay and a coarse cut Brussels pate or slump into a easy chair with a bottle of Newcastle Brown and a battered saveloy, and rest assured that many ‘experts’ were harmed in the making of this book.

Please note this is a three part series - this is part one - London to Iran. This journey was undertaken in a time without mobile phones, without the Internet, without digital cameras and wireless connections. Without blue tooth and denture whitening, Skype, hype and liposuction. In a time when a blackberry was a fruit, an Apple a vegetable and a nasty rash and boils, incurable. Indeed without the aid of most of the critical inventions of the past 15 years. That such a monumental odyssey was possible at all in such primitive times may be the cause of disbelief but despite the catalog of disasters, bad decisions and wild swings from feeling like intrepid explorers to feeling like a luxury hotel with en suite everything we did set out from London one morning on a tandem and arrive eighteen months later in Sydney, almost in one piece. Our route took us across Western and what was then still Eastern Europe and over the Bosphorus into Asia and onto the Silk Route made famous by Marco Polo. Despite initially being refused a visa and the British Consulate warning us not to go, Iran followed Turkey and then Pakistan and the Himalayas into North China. Three months later we emerged to continue into Thailand, through Malaysia and Indonesia and then eventually across to Australia and down to Sydney, 32,248 kilometers of cycling later. In between were celebrity sponsorship, fifteen countries, a failed attempt to cross a war zone, the highest road pass in the world, two arrests, crashes, breakdowns, dengue fever, earth tremors, fires, an ambush and stoning in a remote Himalayan valley and a game of cat and mouse with the Chinese Public Security Bureau. Recognized by Guinness as a World Record, we’ve been trading on this ridiculous feat of deluded endeavor ever since and Wild Dogs and Nutters is on its way to being the silliest and most inspiring feel good account of resculpting one’s buttocks across 32,000 kilometers of some of the world’s most extreme landscapes. Please note this is a three part series - this is part one - London to Iran.

Leave the hordes behind, pack some sandwiches and head off for a grand day out. Whether it's the National Fruit Collection or the pub where time stood still, Britain is stuffed full of surprising and idiosyncratic local attractions. The authors of Bollocks to Alton Towers, the bestselling celebration of the plucky underdogs of tourism, have ventured even farther off the beaten track and into the corners that corporate branding forgot, to bring you more unique, glorious and uncomonly British days out. Here you'll discover: The garden centre with a replica of Del Boy's living room The joys of a Melton Mowbray pork pie pilgramage The rude charms of the Boscastle Witchcraft Museum The Clowns' Gallery that paints a smile on Hackney's face This book is a reminder of all the odd things that make the British what we are. A hidden, eccentric and joyous world of teas, fans, trains, shoes and puppets is waiting for you out there - far from the sodding crowd.

When social distancing is over, can people still keep their distance? I only do the things I like now, rather than the things I should - is that alright? And these days, why has everyone got an opinion on everything and insist on sharing it? Oh. Scratch that one. From one of Britain's most-loved national treasures, comes a much-needed Bible of straight-talking honesty and sharp observational humour: following an unprecedented time of collective global insanity, Freddie is ready to impart his effortless charm, wit and wisdom on a wild array of topics. From the significant: climate change - maybe it's our time to go? To the time-worn: what even is political correctness and has the world really gone mad? To the essential: just what do you get when you receive the coveted Toby Carvery Gold Card? In Right, Said Fred, Freddie takes you on a whirlwind tour of his brain as he ponders more of life's most unfathomable questions.

Showing the same incisive and outrageous wit as in his previous books, where he first took on the self-help craze then New Labour's addiction to spin, Alistair Beaton now tackles the management gurus. Read this book and you will be transformed overnight into a successful modern manager, capable of talking authentic management bollocks at any hour of the day or night, because, let's face it, talking bollocks is what modern management is all about. Below are a few of the gems contained within THE LITTLE BOOK OF MANAGEMENT BOLLOCKS...RISK MANAGEMENT Improve risk management outcomes by never investing in anything. INSPIRING OTHERS As a manager, it's your job to inspire others. If there's nothing inspiring about you, just use fear instead.

Seven European Cup finals. Seven fans. Seven amazing adventures following the team they love. This book celebrates the achievements of Liverpool FC in Europe, and in particular a love affair with Old Big Ears - the European Cup. It's an ongoing affair that began with the legendary and, in those days, unprecedented exodus of 30,000 Liverpool fans to Rome in 1977, has taken in the glories of Paris and Istanbul, endured the horror of Brussels, and still burns as brightly today with Athens 2007, just the latest staging post of Liverpool's trans-European express. Above all, Here We Go Gathering Cups In May tells of the bond between a club and its fans: the lengths those fans will go to in order to be there at the final to cheer on their team, vivid accounts of what happened along the way, their escapades in some of Europe’s iconic capitals, and their recollections of those historic nights – nights of glory and, sometimes, nights of tragedy.