Target. Observe. Ridicule. You run into them every day—the striped-shirt guy, the karaoke master, the dude with a pencil-thin beard, the guy who won’t shut up about his fantasy football team—characters who annoy, irritate, and incense us all. Based on the wildly popular essay on ThePhatPhree.com by Mike Polk, this book is a look inside the heads of the most infuriating douchebags on Earth. It’s the best of ThePhatPhree.com plus more than fifty all-new, hilarious pieces written by some of your favorite writers from this site. Everyone’s (Least) Favorite, The Striped-Shirt Guy … I will valet tonight! I will treat the valet with contempt and make sure that he knows that I am superior to him. I will tell him, “Take it easy on the brakes, champ”! When I do not hook up with a girl at the club, I will say that the place is “full of skanks” and wait in line at another bar, only to strike out again! Your “Cool” High School Teacher … Here are some things I allow in my class that other teachers don’t: eating, drinking, swearing, dancing, smoking, fighting, cell phones, Texas hold ’em, iPods, and sex. Like my Goo Goo Dolls tee? Anyone else here down with the Dolls? No? Me either. I’m just wearing it as a goof. The Guy with Amazing Taste in Music … Personally, I haven’t listened to the radio in fifteen years. If you have ever heard a band on the radio, then I can assure you, I am not a fan. I stopped listening to American music about ten years ago.

Combining the snarky intelligence of "The Onion" with the broad appeal of BudLite's "Real Men of Genius," this book forms a vital part of The Phat Phree'smission: Observe. Target. Ridicule.

To stripe a surface serves to distinguish it, to point it out, to oppose it or associate it with another surface, and thus to classify it, to keep an eye on it, to verify it, even to censor it. Throughout the ages, the stripe has made its mark in mysterious ways. From prisoners' uniforms to tailored suits, a street sign to a set of sheets, Pablo Picasso to Saint Joseph, stripes have always made a bold statement. But the boundary that separates the good stripe from the bad is often blurred. Why, for instance, were stripes associated with the devil during the Middle Ages? How did stripes come to symbolize freedom and unity after the American and French revolutions? When did the stripe become a standard in men's fashion? "In the stripe," writes author Michel Pastoureau, "there is something that resists enclosure within systems." So before putting on that necktie or waving your country's flag, look to The Devil's Cloth for a colorful history of the stripe in all its variety, controversy, and connotation.

It's the first day of school, and Camilla discovers that she is covered from head to toe in stripes, then polka-dots, and any other pattern spoken aloud! With a little help, she learns the secret of accepting her true self, in spite of her peculiar ailment.

A Headless Case Part IV in the series is about PI Simon Fintch. The famous TV personality and food writer Roger Woods finds a severed woman’s head in his bag in his locker at the gym in New York. He can’t identify the victim and he can’t understand why he has been given the macabre find. It is completely impossible to identify the victim and he himself can’t understand the motive for the crime. The Police have been investigating the scene around the gym to find the rest of the victims, but they haven’t been able to find anything. There has also been an investigation into whether there is another case of a female body without a head. No such case has been found in the rest of the United States. Simon Fintch is tasked with solving the case and that takes him to Roger Woods's childhood home in the idyllic house from the year 1847 where his sister Melissa Woods still lives. It will once again be an intractable case for Simon, it will take many hearings before he comes up with the solution. This is an extra hard time for Simon who has lots of problems with his family that also take his time and strength. After Simon solves the case, something very unexpected and tragic happens and his whole life will change for a long time to come.

Sew edgy, urban clothes with this stylish sewing book and add a touch of originality to your wardrobe. More and more women are opting to make their own clothes, but most of the books on the market emphasize girly, feminine designs. She Wears the Pants is the first Japanese sewing book (in English) to focus on the increasingly popular "borrowed–from–the–boys" look. Already one of the best–known and reviewed sewing books in Japan, this sporty addition to the sew–it–yourself craze is poised to take the American DIY sewing market by storm. Sometimes women are in the mood for clothes with strong, clean lines and casual sophistication—polish and simplicity without the frills. She Wears the Pants is the book for those times. A graduate of the Bunka Fashion Institute, Yuko Takada provides patterns and instructions for making twenty spare and streamlined wardrobe items, including: Versatile tops that can be either casual or dressy Jackets that are timeless and unique Dresses and skirts that are straight-line or draped Three different pants lengths, from culottes to full-length trousers And much, much more! Patterns can be easily adjusted to suit any body size, and Takada shows readers how to select inexpensive, readily available fabrics and transform them into an elegant new wardrobe. Understated never looked so good!

Professor Matthew Eastman walks into his office one afternoon and suddenly discovers that he's "forgotten" a year of his life. It is now 2005, but he doesn't remember anything from 2004. A therapist pulls him through his life, crisis-by-crisis and sin-by-sin, until they reach 2004. That was the year when he began researching a Russian novel that includes elements of black magic. That book, "The Master and Margarita," slowly takes over his life and steers him towards where he doesn't want to go, to an affair with a student that he doesn't want to remember.