The history books are full of heroes and villains … but what about all the idiots? Comedian and armchair historian Mikey Robins tells the astonishing story of human stupidity, one idiot at a time. Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity, and I’m not sure about the universe. Albert Einstein History is full of heroes and villains. But then there are the idiots. Idiots, Follies & Misadventures shows that human stupidity has always been our constant companion. History tends to omit tales of human fallibility. We overlook the dubious and ridiculous contributions made by history’s tawdry parade of knuckleheads. But this book is a call to arms … knuckleheads assemble! And once assembled, prepare to be mocked. Just because history has mostly swept these idiots under the carpet does not make them by any means unsung heroes. These are rather ridiculous cautionary tales, to amuse and add some perspective to our current rash of stupidity. Tales such as: Why you shouldn’t soak your underpants in mercury. The booze cruise that plunged England into civil war. The Russian nuclear briefcase and pizzas. Flatulence jars and The Great Plague of London. The deadly green wallpaper that proved a problem for Britain's trendy middle-class.

THE BOOK OF NOODLES or Simpletons Fools and Their Follies is a book filled with unique collection of Noodle-tales from around the world. But what is a Noodle? After a fashion, the typical noodle in popular tales "points a moral". These poor fellows follow their instructions only too literally, and with a firm conviction that they are thus doing a very clever thing. But the consequence is almost always ridiculous. They practically show the fallacy of the old saw that "fools learn by experience," for his next folly is sure to be greater than the last, in spite of every caution to the contrary. They are generally very honest, and do everything "with the best intentions." Their minds are incapable of entertaining more than one idea at a time; but to that they holds fast, with the tenacity of the lobster's claw: they cannot be diverted from their task until, by some accident, a fresh idea displaces it; and so on they go from one blunder to another. Their blunders, however, which in the case of an ordinary man would infallibly result in disaster to himself or to others, sometimes lead the fools to unexpected good fortune. It is to them the great Persian poet Sádí alludes when he says, "The alchemist died of grief and distress, while the blockhead found a treasure under a ruin." Men of intelligence toil painfully to acquire a mere "livelihood" but the noodle stumbles upon great wealth in the midst of his wildest vagaries. In brief, they are, in stories, at least--a standing illustration of the "vanity of human life"! So, enjoy this collection of Noodle-tales brought together by W A Clouston, from widely scattered sources. While this book may bring you enjoyment and occasional bouts of mirth, its purchase will also benefit someone somewhere, for 10% of the publisher’s profit will be donated to charity. YESTERDAY'S BOOKS FOR TOMORROW'S CHARITIES ========= KEYWORDS/TAGS: book of noodles, moral tales, simpletons, fools, folly, idiots, luck of the Irish, ancient Greece, Gotham, gothamite, drolls, drolleries, variants, analogues, silly son, four Brahmans, first Brahman, second Brahman, third Brahman, fourth Brahman, conclusion, three great noodles, fool of Hereford, fool of Huntington, blunders, task driven, accidents, blockhead, treasure, foolish, honest, thought process, ideas,

"History is full of heroes and villains, but then there are the idiots. Idiots, Follies and Misadventures shows that human stupidity has always been our constant companion. History tends to omit tales of human fallibility. We overlook the dubious and ridiculous contributions made by history's tawdry parade of knuckleheads. But this book is a call to arms ... knuckleheads assemble! And once assembled, prepare to be mocked. Just because history has mostly swept these idiots under the carpet does not make them by any means unsung heroes. These are rather ridiculous cautionary tales, to hopefully amuse and add some perspective to our current rash of stupidity. Tales such as: - Why you shouldn't soak your underpants in mercury. - The booze cruise that plunged England into civil war. - The Russian nuclear briefcase and pizzas. - Flatulence jars and The Great Plague of London. - The deadly green wallpaper that proved a problem for Britain's trendy middle-class."--Back cover.

It is often said that we live in an era of constant outrage, but we are definitely not the inventors of outrageousness. Let's be honest, human beings have always been appalling. Not everyone and not all the time, but our history is littered with those whose work and deeds have rendered them . . . reprehensible. Sometimes it's our most esteemed luminaries who behave the worst. What are we to make of Catherine the Great's extensive collection of pornographic furniture, Hans Christian Andersen's too-much-information diary and Karl Marx's epic pub crawls? Or hall-of-fame huckster William McCloundy, who in 1901 actually 'sold' the Brooklyn Bridge to an unsuspecting tourist, and the pharaoh who covered his slaves in honey to keep flies off his meal? Did you know about the royal ticklers of the House of Romanov, and the bizarre coronation rituals of early Irish kings? (Let's just say that eating a white horse wasn't the weirdest part of the ceremony.) So sit back and rest your conscience: there will be a host of scoundrels, bounders and reprobates, tales of lust and power aplenty, as we indulge in that sweet spot where history meets outrage, with just a bit of old-school TMZ thrown in for good measure.

William Alexander Clouston (1843-1896) was a famous British Folklorist. He contributed to valuable studies combining Eastern traditional literature with Norse and Western Folklore. His works include: The Book of Noodles: Stories of Simpletons; or, Fools and Their Follies (1888), Flowers from a Persian Garden and Other Papers (1890) and Book of Wise Sayings (1893). "LIKE popular tales in general, the original sources of stories of simpletons are for the most part not traceable. The old Greek jests of this class had doubtless been floating about among different peoples long before they were reduced to writing. The only tales and apologues of noodles or stupid folk to which an approximate date can be assigned are those found in the early Buddhist books, especially in the "J? takas, " or Birth-stories, which are said to have been related to his disciples by Gautama, the illustrious founder of Buddhism, as incidents which occurred to himself and others in former births, and were afterwards put into a literary form by his followers. "