Christie Mellor describes the new-found freedoms to be had when your adult children move out.

“Lays out a plan for parents to enjoy themselves and not be slaves to their children while still offering their kids a warm, nurturing environment.” —Publishers Weekly Parents were here first! How did the kids suddenly take control? Sure the world has changed from the days when children were supposed to be seen and not heard but things have gotten a little out of hand. What about some quality time for the grownups? Author Christie Mellor’s hilarious, personal, refreshing, and actually quite useful advice delightfully rights the balance between parent and child. In dozens of short, wickedly funny chapters, she skewers today’s parental absurdities and reminds us how to make child-rearing a kick. With recipes, helpful hints, and illustrations, this high-spirited book is the only book parents will really need—and enjoy. Includes chapters on: Screaming: Is It Necessary? Bedtime: Is Five-Thirty Too Early? Child Labor: Not Just for the Third World! “Children’s Music”: Why? . . . and much, much more “Harried mothers who have given over their lives to their adorable little angels, beware: This book is the equivalent of a cocktail in the face . . . The book details the glories of saying no to your children, explains when you’ve gone too far in childproofing your home, laments our over-reliance on camcorders (‘a disease’) and suggests that the Tooth Fairy is getting robbed. Best of all, there’s a recipe for teaching your tot how to mix a simple martini just the way you like it—with lots of alcohol.” —Chicago Sun-Times

At the playground, at the pet store, on a car trip, or at home: Dick, Jane, and Sally always have fun. Will Dick get another dog? Will Sally finally win a game of hide-and-go-seek? And who are Dick and Jane's favorite friends? With short stories and text from the original Dick and Jane basic readers, this is a perfect chapter book for eager new readers!

"In this new book the principal characters Dick, Jane and Sally have grown up"--P. [5].

From Christie Mellor, the best-selling author of The Three-Martini Playdate, comes this hilarious (and helpful) guide to recovering from getting those little angels into college and out of the house. Filled with unapologetically funny yet entirely sympathetic advice, Mellor answers important questions (Is $200 an hour too much to spend for exam tutoring? Is moving to an apartment near campus ever an option?) and offers wise counsel on saying good-bye, getting kids to stay in touch (without begging), and coping when they come home to roost (which they will—for holidays, summer break, and possibly for years after graduation). Best of all, she inspires empty nesters to embrace their newfound freedom and enjoy their lives to the full.

Dick, Jane, Sally, Mother, and Father are not the only family having fun. This time, meet Mike, twin sisters Pam and Penny, and their parents. Two families mean twice the laughs and twice the fun. Beginning readers will love the way each chapter is an individual story, and parents and educators will appreciate the way this format encourages young readers? progression.

"Look, Jane, " said Dick. "Here is something funny. Can you guess what it is?"