The humorist asked his readers to share their least favorite tunes and chronicles the hilarious responses. When funnyman Dave Barry asked readers about their least favorite tunes, he thought he was penning just another installment of his weekly syndicated humor column. But the witty writer was flabbergasted by the response when over 10,000 readers voted. “I have never written a column that got a bigger response than the one announcing the Bad Song Survey,” Barry wrote. Based on the results of the survey, Dave Barry’s Book of Bad Songs is a compilation of some of the worst songs ever written. Dave Barry fans will relish his quirky take. Music buffs too will appreciate this humorous stroll through the world’s worst lyrics. The only thing wrong with this book is that readers will find themselves unable to stop mentally singing the greatest hits of Gary Puckett. Praise for Dave Barry’s Book of Bad Songs “Barry is his usual puckish self, but the real surprise here is how funny many of the survey respondents are.” —Kirkus Reviews “Who can resist such a book?” —Publishers Weekly

How "MacArthur Park" goes, so I sang it, giving it my best shot, and Rob laughed so hard that when I got to the part about leaving the cake out in the rain, and it took so long to bake it, and I'll never have that recipe again, Rob was on the floor."

When Dave Barry is on the loose, no one is safe! What Dave Barry did for the men’s movement in his Complete Guide to Guys and for foreign relations when he did Japan he now does for . . . everything in America. The rapacious observer of Tupperware ladies and leisure concept salesmen sounds off on: Football—Football is more than just a game. It is a potential opportunity to see a live person lying on the ground with a bone sticking out of his leg, while the fans, to show their appreciation, perform “the wave.” Sailing—There’s nothing quite like getting out on the open sea, where you can forget about the hassles and worries of life on land, and concentrate on the hassles and worries of life on the sea, such as death by squid. Gambling—Off-Track Betting parlors are the kinds of places where you never see signs that say, “Thank You for Not Smoking.” The best you can hope for is, “Thank You for Not Spitting Pieces of Your Cigar on My Neck.” “The good news: he’s funny as ever. The bad news: the book is only 304 pages.”—Los Angeles Daily News

Seth Weinstein always knew Tina was way, way, way out of his league. Which is why he’s still astonished that he’s on a plane heading for their wedding in Florida. The Groom Posse has already pulled an airport prank on him—and he’s survived! It should be easy going from now on. But Seth has absolutely no idea what he’s about to get into. A simple drink or two with the boys sparks a series of events that will pit Seth and his friends against everything and everyone imaginable, from his very powerful, very disapproving soon-to-be father-in-law to the federal government to a love-struck orangutan. Seth’s hope for smooth sailing is turning into a trip on the Titanic. And the water is getting deeper by the minute…

Love once inspired sonnets, plays, novels, and countless romantic songs. But romance can become obsession, and nowadays, love songs are creepier than ever. Even the Police's stalker anthem "Every Breath You Take" is a popular choice at weddings and funerals. In Touch Me, I'm Sick, Tom Reynolds offers hilarious riffs on 52 love songs that have gone off the rails into the realm of the tawdry, the overwhelming, the obsessive, the self-absorbed, and the completely weird. Including songs by artists as diverse as Melissa Etheridge, Michael Jackson, Paul Anka, Sinéad O'Connor, and Slipknot, he also pillories a handful of the 1,700 different songs called "Butterfly." Praise for Tom Reynolds' I Hate Myself and Want to Die: "A tremendous idea . . . Reynolds ameliorates the pain of having put his ear up close to some of the most inconsiderate despair anthems of our time by having enormous fun deconstructing them." --The Sunday Times "Full of premium trivia and pinpoint pomposity-pricking, Reynolds has made comedy gold from the full base metal of misery." --NME "An entertaining and well-researched set of cautionary tales music fans will enjoy. Consider the list a batch of enthralling liner notes for a box set that comes with razor blades." --Playboy "Bridget Jones would love it." --The Scotsman

Please note: This is a companion version & not the original book. Sample Book Insights: #1 The survey respondents chose MacArthur Park as the worst song, followed by Yummy Yummy Yummy and Love to Love You Baby. #2 If you want to hear the best version of it, go buy a CD put out by Rhino Records. #3 There was a mining disaster, and all the men were killed. The company sent the boys to their new homes in ships, and the lads were all fond of each other. They had a farewell party, and they ate cookies and drank tea. And they had a song. And they had a dance. Dancing was apparently a big part of the party: And we had a great time, oh, we did We had a party, yes we did, And we ate cookies and drank tea. The girls were crying, and there were tears in their eyes, as they said goodbye to their sweet little boys. And as they boarded their ship, and sailed away from their native land, their hearts were filled with sadness and longing. For the boys were going to work on the mines, the mines where no one ever comes back from. And when the boys got to their new homes in Australia and America, they were so very happy. They were so very happy. But when the boys went to sleep at night, they slept in dreams of home. And when they woke up in the morning, they worked on the mines again. They worked on the mines again. . #4 The survey respondents chose MacArthur Park as the worst song, followed by Yummy Yummy Yummy and Love to Love You Baby.

If there’s one thing that New York Times bestselling author and Pulitzer Prize-winning columnist Dave Barry is an expert on, it’s raising a daughter. …which means he’s not an expert on much considering the breadth of his knowledge on that subject fills only a single chapter of a book. However, what Dave Barry is good at is giving unsolicited advice on topics he’s definitively not an expert on. In fact, he now has an entire book filled with guidance on things he knows nothing about, including: surviving in the wild, wooing women, cremation, maintaining a scintillating conversation, Justin Bieber, the U.S. Postal Service, enduring the TSA, the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, and, most obviously, being a professional author. With trademark wit and unmatched insight into the insanity of everyday life, Dave Barry presents a series of hilarious, never-before-published essays on the trials and tribulations of living and laughing in the modern age.