THE F**KING IDIOT . . . Vlad Wieckowski has seen better days. With only the clothes on his back, he's out of money, out of luck, and out of gas. CONFRONTS THE EVIL PINT-SIZED BASTARD . . . That little sh*t Henry Winkle is at it again, and this time he's got warehouses full of toxic gas at his disposal. Can anyone stop his evil plot to gas the world? AND GETS F**KED OVER BY A MYSTERIOUS DIPSH*T AGENT . . . By his letter he is known. W. W for Wacky. W for Wicked. W for WTF?! WILL THE INDELIBLE SH*THEAD GET HIS REVENGE? Or is mankind totally f**ked? Discombobulated is the fifth episode of an ongoing serial, created specifically for the Eight Hour Fiction Challenge. Each installment is approximately 3,000-4,000 words.

THE F**KING IDIOT . . . Vlad Wieckowski has seen better days. With only the clothes on his back, he's out of money, out of luck, and out of gas. CONFRONTS THE EVIL PINT-SIZED BASTARD . . . That little sh*t Henry Winkle is at it again, and this time he's got warehouses full of toxic gas at his disposal. Can anyone stop his evil plot to gas the world? AND GETS F**KED OVER BY A MYSTERIOUS DIPSH*T AGENT . . . By his letter he is known. W. W for Wacky. W for Wicked. W for WTF?! WILL THE INDELIBLE SH*THEAD GET HIS REVENGE? Or is mankind totally f**ked? Disguised is the sixth episode of an ongoing serial, created specifically for the Eight Hour Fiction Challenge. Each installment is approximately 3,000-4,000 words.

Zack Pimpton's ass never felt worse, and it doesn't help that his doctor is a part time comedian. Unfortunately, Zack is quite the bastard himself and accidentally says the wrong thing that causes the good, old doctor to snap. Intended for mature (and not so mature) audiences. Approximately 2,300 words. EXCERPT FROM THE CHAPPED-ASS CRITIC “Doc, you’ve got to help me,” a thin, wiry man named Zack Pimpton bent over the padded table and rubbed his behind. “My ass hurts really, really bad. I think I might have broken it.” A bead of sweat trickled down his forehead. “How did this happen?” Dr. Marsh asked. “I don't know. I was typing up a review when suddenly my butt began to hurt. At first it stung just a little. I tried ignoring it, but it got worse and worse until I eventually found myself here. It's terrible! I can’t believe I was able to drive over here.” He tried sitting and recoiled immediately. “Well, you're in luck! It's nothing life-threatening, that’s for sure, but I'm afraid you won’t have use of your buttocks again,” the portly doctor cracked a smile.

Out of Control chronicles the dawn of a new era in which the machines and systems that drive our economy are so complex and autonomous as to be indistinguishable from living things.

Helen Hubbard's fears have finally been confirmed. During brunch one morning in her favorite restaurant, her husband Gary confesses to cheating on her, and is ready to leave at a moment's notice. When she pries deeper into the matter, she discovers more about his mysterious lover Muffy than she cares to know. “So you’re leaving me for a fart???” Helen exclaimed. For mature (and not so mature) audiences. Approximately 2,500 words.

The search for the hairiest butt on Venus leads to explosive results. Approximately 1,600 words. WARNING: Butts, with lots of hair on them.

No one can describe a wine like Karen MacNeil. Comprehensive, entertaining, authoritative, and endlessly interesting, The Wine Bible is a lively course from an expert teacher, grounding the reader deeply in the fundamentals—vine-yards and varietals, climate and terroir, the nine attributes of a wine’s greatness—while layering on tips, informative asides, anecdotes, definitions, photographs, maps, labels, and recommended bottles. Discover how to taste with focus and build a wine-tasting memory. The reason behind Champagne’s bubbles. Italy, the place the ancient Greeks called the land of wine. An oak barrel’s effect on flavor. Sherry, the world’s most misunderstood and underappreciated wine. How to match wine with food—and mood. Plus everything else you need to know to buy, store, serve, and enjoy the world’s most captivating beverage.