'If your relationship is so bad, why don't you just leave them?' 'If you were in such an abusive relationship, why did you stay with them for so long?' 'If you knew you were in a relationship with such a toxic person, why didn't you ask people for help?' If you've ever been asked these questions, aside from being ignorant and hurtful, you'll know it's beyond frustrating. The answer to the above questions, whilst it's complex and often confusing, can be given with two words: trauma bonded. If you find you're in a relationship that you know is so toxic that it's crushing your very being, but you can't bring yourself to leave, you may be in the clutches of a tight trauma bond. If you're constantly feeling on edge, forever working to appease your spouse to little avail and like you're constantly being chipped away at with their abusive behavior, then I can understand how emotionally shattering it feels to live this way. If in the same breath, it breaks your heart to even consider leaving them because you can't imagine life without them, then I can understand that feeling too; because I was trauma bonded to my abusive ex. From my own personal experience and from the experiences other survivors have opened up to me about, this book will cover the following: - What trauma bonding really is - The 7 stages that lead to you becoming trauma bonded - The parallels that Stockholm syndrome has with trauma bonding - The 5 stages you go through when you come to accept you're trauma bonded - The cognitive dissonance a trauma bond can cause - Breaking free from the traumatic bond This book will also include my own experiences and I'll draw upon those to help you really understand trauma bonding, and let you know that you're not alone in being shackled by this emotionally crippling bond. More importantly, this book will help you understand that the invisible chain that tethers you to your abuser can be broken.

Some really great books just keep getting better! For seventeen years The Betrayal Bond has been the primary source for therapists and patients wrestling the effects of emotional pain and harm caused by exploitation from someone they trusted. Divorce, litigation, incest and child abuse, domestic violence, kidnapping, professional exploitation and religious abuse are all areas of trauma bonding. These are situations and relationships of incredible intensity or importance lend themselves more easily to an exploitation of trust or power. In The Betrayal Bond, Dr. Carnes presents an in-depth study of these relationships; why they form, who is most susceptible, and how they become so powerful. Dr. Carnes also gives a clear explanation of the bond that compels people to tolerate the intolerable, and for the first time, maps out the brain connection that makes being with hurtful people comparable to 'a drug of choice.' Most importantly, Carnes provides practical steps to identify compulsive attachment patterns and ultimately to change or end them for good. This new edition includes: New science for understanding how our brains can make a prison of bad relationships New assessments and insights based on 50,000 research participants A new section utilizing the latest findings in attachment research and narrative therapy to concretely rewrite and rescript bad experiences A redefinition of the factors contributing to addictive relationships

Overcome toxic relationship bonds and begin to heal Freeing yourself from a trauma bond can feel overwhelming. But with the right tools, you can let go of the past and move forward to a brighter future. This supportive workbook is filled with evidence-based strategies and exercises to help you break the cycle of abuse and thrive. Understand your experience—Learn what trauma bonding is and gain insight from the stories of other people who have experienced abuse. Discover tools for healing trauma—Build skills for breaking your toxic relationship with proven exercises like starting a walking meditation practice and rating your level of self-care. Beyond trauma—Explore the aftermath of leaving an abuser, including managing difficult emotions and grief, reclaiming your identity, avoiding relapse, and preparing to move forward with your new life. Empower yourself and take control of your future with this supportive workbook.

From a leading voice on recovering from toxic relationships, a deeply insightful guide to getting back to your "old self" again--in order to truly heal and move on. Jackson MacKenzie has helped millions of people in their struggle to understand the experience of toxic relationships. His first book, Psychopath Free, explained how to identify and survive the immediate situation. In this highly anticipated new book, he guides readers on what to do next--how to fully heal from abuse in order to find love and acceptance for the self and others. Through his close work with--and deep connection to--thousands of survivors of abusive relationships Jackson discovered that most survivors have symptoms of trauma long after the relationship is over. These range from feelings of numbness and emptiness to depression, perfectionism, substance abuse, and many more. But he’s also found that it is possible to work through these symptoms and find love on the other side, and this book shows how. Through a practice of mindfulness, introspection, and exercises using specific tools, readers learn to identify the protective self they've developed - and uncover the core self, so that they can finally move on to live a full and authentic life--to once again feel light, free, and whole, and ready to love again. This book addresses and provides crucial guidance on topics and conditions like: complex PTSD, Narcissistic abuse, Avoidant Personality Disorder, Codependency, Core wounding, toxic shame, Borderline Personality Disorder, and so many more. Whole Again offers hope and multiple strategies to anyone who has survived a toxic relationship, as well as anyone suffering the effects of a breakup involving lying, cheating and other forms of abuse--to release old wounds and safely let the love back inside where it belongs.

In this groundbreaking book, a leading clinical psychiatrist redefines how we think about and treat victims of trauma. A "stunning achievement" that remains a "classic for our generation." (Bessel van der Kolk, M.D., author of The Body Keeps the Score). Trauma and Recovery is revered as the seminal text on understanding trauma survivors. By placing individual experience in a broader political frame, Harvard psychiatrist Judith Herman argues that psychological trauma is inseparable from its social and political context. Drawing on her own research on incest, as well as a vast literature on combat veterans and victims of political terror, she shows surprising parallels between private horrors like child abuse and public horrors like war. Hailed by the New York Times as "one of the most important psychiatry works to be published since Freud," Trauma and Recovery is essential reading for anyone who seeks to understand how we heal and are healed.

Breaking up in normal circumstances is hard enough. If you throw a narcissist into the equation, it makes it all the more difficult. Not only are you left heartbroken from the separation, but the actions and behaviors of the narcissist post-break-up are nothing short of cruel, confusing, and downright crazymaking. You feel like your world has ended and you don't know how to rebuild it. In this short book, I want to use my own experience with a narcissist to highlight and outline the following for you: - discarding, and why the narcissist does this. This is a cruel tactic used by the narcissist to either punish you or because you have nothing left to give them. - what a narcissist does at the end of a relationship. Whilst all narcissists are different, you can count on one thing being consistent: their behavior. - how the narc feels and deals with the break-up. - the toxic narcissistic relationship pattern, so you can avoid being sucked into it once more. If you're looking to read this book, you're likely heartbroken and looking for some guidance, support, or understanding. As someone who has been through the hell of a narcissistic relationship, I can offer you all three, and I hope this book can help you make sense of this heartbreaking time.

An evidence-based guide to recovering from gaslighting Gaslighting is a targeted form of manipulation, deception, and control that makes you doubt your own perceptions and memories. Whether you've experienced gaslighting or emotional abuse from someone in your life--or you think you might have--Break Free from Gaslighting gives you the tools to recognize it and the steps to begin healing. The truth about gaslighting--Find clear definitions of exactly what gaslighting is, how gaslighters operate, and safe ways to manage and avoid them. Proven techniques--Use strategies from methods like mindfulness and acceptance and commitment therapy to set boundaries, reclaim your sense of self, and build healthier relationships. Realistic examples--Read anecdotes about people who've experienced different types of gaslighting to help you see what it looks like and understand that it isn't your fault. Written exercises--Find insightful questions and thoughtful prompts to help you identify examples of emotional abuse within your life and process your feelings. Reclaim your independence after gaslighting with this guide to understanding how it works and taking steps toward breaking free.