The Haggadah About Nothing

The Haggadah About Nothing
Title The Haggadah About Nothing PDF eBook
Author Rabbi Sam Reinstein
Publisher
Pages 178
Release 2020-01-20
Genre
ISBN 9780578832821

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The Haggadah about Nothing by Rabbi Sam Reinstein features commentary and parody connecting the Haggadah, the Exodus story, and other Jewish texts to the nine seasons of the seminal show, Seinfeld.

New American Haggadah

New American Haggadah
Title New American Haggadah PDF eBook
Author Jonathan Safran Foer
Publisher Little, Brown
Pages 0
Release 2014-03-04
Genre Religion
ISBN 9780316069878

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Jonathan Safran Foer's and Nathan Englander's spectacular Haggadah-now in paperback. Upon hardcover publication, NEW AMERICAN HAGGADAH was praised as a momentous re-envisioning through prayer, song, and ritual of one of our oldest, most timeless, and sacred stories-Moses leading the ancient Israelites out of slavery in Egypt to wander the desert for 40 years before reaching the Promised Land. Featuring a new translation of the traditional text by Nathan Englander and provocative essays by a collection of major Jewish writers and thinkers, it was received not only as a religious document but a magnificent literary and artistic achievement. Now, after two years of patience, those readers who asked for a paperback edition have gotten their wish.

The Unorthodox Haggadah

The Unorthodox Haggadah
Title The Unorthodox Haggadah PDF eBook
Author Nathan Phillips
Publisher Andrews McMeel Publishing
Pages 86
Release 2015-02-03
Genre Humor
ISBN 1449470351

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The Unorthodox Haggadah is a way to enjoy the strange and wonderful world of religion, while skipping the boring parts. Ritual is at the core of every culture, but people are no longer into dogma. This book offers the ritual with a hilarious, irreverent twist. It is genuinely funny, fun to flip through, and a riot to use at the seder. Make sure everyone around your table has a copy for the next Passover. Sample text: Let's begin by drinking the blood of a virgin lamb off the tip of a flaming golden scimitar. In the event that you've de-virginized your lamb or misplaced your scimitar, use wine. Now, we toast the Israelites for rolling out of Egypt in time and generally being clever. Here are a few things they've invented since 1901: Jeans, lipstick, Hollywood, the fax machine, psychoanalysis, and the weekend. Thanks for getting us out of Egypt before shit got too real. Drink the second cup of wine while leaning to the left. “…light up your seder.” -Huffington Post "A cool, creative affront to Jewish grandmothers." -MediaBistro “Redefine Bitter Herbs…slightly insane.” -Tablet Magazine "It’s the Passover you never knew you always wanted...While there are many (many!) different Haggadah versions out there, this one is hands down our favorite (sorry Maxwell house). Genuinely funny, which puts it head and shoulders above 99.9% of the treacly crap people foist on unsuspecting seder guests to try to fool them into thinking they’re actually enjoying themselves.” -Heeb Magazine­

For This We Left Egypt?

For This We Left Egypt?
Title For This We Left Egypt? PDF eBook
Author Dave Barry
Publisher Macmillan + ORM
Pages 128
Release 2017-03-07
Genre Humor
ISBN 125011022X

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The book you hold before you is no ordinary Haggadah. If you’ve ever suffered through a Seder, you’re well aware of the fact that the entire evening can last as long as the exodus from Egypt itself. There are countless stories, dozens of blessings, and far too many handwashings while the meal turns cold. Now prepare to be entertained by another version of the book that’s responsible for this interminable tradition. With this hilarious parody Haggadah from the comedic minds of Dave Barry, Alan Zweibel, and Adam Mansbach, good Jews everywhere will no longer have to sit (and sleep) through a lengthy and boring Seder. In For This We Left Egypt?, the authors will be take you through every step of the Seder, from getting rid of all the chametz in your home by setting it on fire with a kosher blowtorch to a retelling of the Passover story starring Pharaoh Schmuck and a burning bush that sounds kind of like Morgan Freeman, set against the backdrop of the Promised Land—which turned out not to be a land of milk and honey but rather one of rocks and venomous scorpions the size of Yorkshire terriers. You then eat a celebratory brisket and wrap up the whole evening by taking at least forty-five minutes to say good-bye to everyone. So gather all the Jews in your life (even the few who don’t appear to be long-suffering) and settle in for a fun way to pass the time while waiting for Elijah to show up.

The Yada Yada Haggadah

The Yada Yada Haggadah
Title The Yada Yada Haggadah PDF eBook
Author Dave Cowen
Publisher
Pages 112
Release 2019
Genre Haggadah
ISBN 9781793219107

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Uncle Eli's Passover Haggadah

Uncle Eli's Passover Haggadah
Title Uncle Eli's Passover Haggadah PDF eBook
Author Eliezer Segal
Publisher No Starch Press
Pages 0
Release 1999
Genre Juvenile Nonfiction
ISBN 9781886411265

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Retells and reinterprets the story of the Jewish Passover, in rhyme.

The New American Haggadah

The New American Haggadah
Title The New American Haggadah PDF eBook
Author Lauren Royal
Publisher Novelty Publishing
Pages 73
Release 2016-03-07
Genre Religion
ISBN 1938907981

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UPDATED: Now with Hebrew characters and gender-neutral phrasing! A Haggadah you can read from cover to cover. No decisions! No skipping! No guilt! A Haggadah long enough to cover everything, yet short enough to conquer boredom. A Haggadah that's easy to follow, even for those who have never led or attended a Seder before. A Haggadah that encourages everyone to participate, without any confusion as to who says what. A Haggadah that celebrates freedom. A Haggadah that highlights traditional Jewish values alongside modern American ideals. A Haggadah that explains everything! _____ This e-book version is for those participants who prefer to read on their ereaders, smartphones, or tablets. Printed paperback copies and other digital formats are also available for purchase on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Apple Books, and Kobo. _____ PRAISE FROM REVIEWERS… “My family and guests loved it. First time we went back to Haggadah to finish the Seder after the meal.” “Thank you for a wonderful Haggadah. It honors our traditions and makes them relevant for today. Even my 13 and 15 year olds were inspired to participate!” “My family and I used this for our first Passover Seder tonight. We had a beautiful experience together. Everything was easy to follow and understand.” “The subtitle—a "simple" version—is not really true. We all felt the text was clear and thorough. This group of long-time Passover observers all learned things.” “We went through the whole Haggadah, the story was told nicely with both English and some Hebrew (and transliterations). We loved it!” “…a clear path to a lovely Passover dinner. Sharing this with newcomers puts them at ease to share in this beautiful tradition.” “Easy to follow, covered everything in a clear way for people unfamiliar with Passover. Appreciate the modern, liberal, inclusive tone. Highly recommended!” “I'm very glad we used "The New American Haggadah" last night and we'll continue to use it in years to come.” “Easy to use. Covers all the basics and tells a great story.” “Fantastic Haggadah. It is the perfect length. Tells the story without being too redundant. I highly recommend this to every family.” “Just right! It captured the traditional story—and not too long nor too short.” “We had a very "mixed" group at our Passover seder this year, ranging from extremely religious to extremely nonreligious, together with devout guests from other religions, and I feel like this book made for an enjoyable and accessible Seder experience for everybody involved.” “This combines all the favorite and traditional aspects of your grandpa's Haggadah while serving the needs of Jews in America today who want a modern explanation. Everyone contributes and there is no confusion at all about what the order is, what part is next, no frantic turning pages back and forth, stage whispering of "what page are we on?" and it has finally quashed the heckling from the Seder table crowd. You'll love this as our family did.” “I was pleased that the updates on concern for minorities was handled well, and the broader philosophies were not "preachy" but rather are thought-provoking and appropriate. The traditional Hebrew prayers are in there, and a comprehensive story of the Exodus is most informative to even those who go through it every year.” “Just finished a Seder guided by the New American Haggadah. We had a group of 23 participants. Everyone got involved in a story that is a cornerstone of the Jewish faith. It is a great read for today's insightful and intelligent Jewish family who has a rational understanding of Jewish history.” _____ You might enjoy this Haggadah if you like: short, simple, and fun Passover dinners; easy Seder meals; events with children and family; or Reform Jewish holidays.