Sexual fantasies. Everyone has them, but no one knows what they mean. People are curious about and often confused by the things that arouse them, yet they are often too ashamed to reveal their most private fantasies to their partners or even their therapists. In this fascinating and provocative book, Dr. Michael J. Bader offers a groundbreaking new theory of sexual desire, one that will liberate men and women and enable them to better understand their sexual preferences. Drawing on his twenty-five years as a psychotherapist and psychoanalyst, Dr. Bader demonstrates that rather than being programmed by biology or society, sexual fantasies and preferences are really psychological antidotes to unconscious dangers. Armed with this novel theory, men and women will no longer need to feel ashamed about what arouses them or confused about what arouses others. Dr. Bader sensitively tells the stories of his patients and explains the meaning of their sexual fantasies. In terms refreshingly free of jargon, he reveals how his profound new theory can be used to decipher a wide variety of sexual fantasies and behavior, ranging from ordinary preferences about positions in bed to flamboyant scenarios worthy of the Marquis de Sade. And yet, Dr. Bader's exciting new theory transcends the realm of individual psychology. Readers will come away with a radically new understanding of such issues as sexual chemistry and boredom, cybersex, pornography, and the differences in how men and women get excited. Both erudite and accessible, Arousal: The Secret Logic of Sexual Fantasies is an important landmark in the literature of sexuality.

This best-selling book is for anyone who wants to experience intimate, powerful lovemaking without anxiety or pressure. It starts with the first principle of intimacy: to experience deep sexual pleasure, you must explore and enjoy-openly and sensually enjoy-basic human touch and caressing. This approach is also unique because it encourages you to focus on your own sexual desire rather than looking for ways to please your partner. Being more in touch with your own enjoyment will lead naturally to greater passion, sensitivity, and pleasure for both partners. Sexual Pleasure takes the reader through a series of stimulating exercises, done alone and with a partner, to increase sensual awareness and experience sexual ecstasy. These exercises can be used by people of any sexual orientation, and by those who may have physical limitations, or who are just learning about their sexuality-anyone seeking the secrets of strong and fulfilling sex.

Is love “blind” when it comes to gender? For women, it just might be. This unsettling and original book offers a radical new understanding of the context-dependent nature of female sexuality. Lisa M. Diamond argues that for some women, love and desire are not rigidly heterosexual or homosexual but fluid, changing as women move through the stages of life, various social groups, and, most important, different love relationships.This perspective clashes with traditional views of sexual orientation as a stable and fixed trait. But that view is based on research conducted almost entirely on men. Diamond is the first to study a large group of women over time. She has tracked one hundred women for more than ten years as they have emerged from adolescence into adulthood. She summarizes their experiences and reviews research ranging from the psychology of love to the biology of sex differences. Sexual Fluidity offers moving first-person accounts of women falling in and out of love with men or women at different times in their lives. For some, gender becomes irrelevant: “I fall in love with the person, not the gender,” say some respondents.Sexual Fluidity offers a new understanding of women’s sexuality—and of the central importance of love.

Shows how the diversity of sexual desires, both normal and unusual, emerge from the interactions between underlying brain processes.

Although there has been much discussion about things like the causes, loss, and maintenance of sexual desire, there has been little research into the nature of sexual desire itself. Consequently, most of the discussions on these topics have gone on without any clear idea about what it is that is being discussed. Readers will be interested that at last there is a full-length book that attempts to say what sexual desire is. Further, this book takes an interdisciplinary and intercultural approach, drawing on a wide range of texts and research. Drawing on such diverse sources as psychology, philosophy, and biology, a thorough discussion of sexual desire is presented. Also presented are new accounts of the sexual process, gender, romantic love, and love's relation to sexual desire.

Accessibly written, this interdisciplinary book reviews theory and research on the characteristics of sexual desire, the individual physical and mental factors that influence the experience of sexual desire (hormones, age, gender, beliefs, mood), the various partner characteristics that incite sexual desire (attractiveness) and the association between sexual desire and interpersonal, relational events and experiences (romantic love). The book concludes with an examination of the personal, interpersonal and societal implications of sexual desire. Throughout, the authors draw on findings from their own body of research on sexual and romantic attraction, as well as on an extensive review of the relevant social, behavioural and medical science