The Rampaging Fuckers of Everything on the Crazy Shitting Planet of the Vomit Atmosphere is a collection of three short novels by a master of satire. Mykle Hansen's subversive tales capture the smugness of mainstream culture. He thrusts his characters into absurd and humorous situations that reveal the defects in the modern social fabric. With the wit of Christopher Moore, the inventiveness of Terry Gilliam and the rudeness of South Park, Hansen's surreal fiction is ridiculously fun to read. Three Bizarro Novels: MONSTER COCKS: A poignant tragedy of penis enlargement gone horribly wrong. JOURNEY TO THE CENTER OF AGNES CUDDLEBOTTOM: A gripping history of the first Starbucks in the anus of an 80-year-old prostitute. CRAZY SHITTING PLANET: A touching parable of love, friendship, and feces.

"Somewhere between the laughtrack of Mark Leyner's work and European surrealism, Hansen's stories shock, titillate, and bombard the reader with dark shards of comedy." - KEVIN SAMPSELL, author of Creamy Bullets

MYKLE HANSEN gives mortality the finger! Death by sandwich! Death by yoga! Death by blimp! In HOORAY FOR DEATH, Famous Author Mykle Hansen draws unconventional humor from deaths tiny and large, and invites you to laugh while you can. Meet The Great Mecanico, super-scientist of super-science, a man who can fix anything but his mother's health. Meet BLIMPMAN, master of the Weight-Loss Ray, and his arch-nemesis Doctor Walrus! Meet Death himself -- a single, deadly male, looking for a lover who will die slowly. Meet Penelope, your dead wife who phones you from the underworld to say she met someone deader than you. Loaded with Hansen's signature wit and weirdness, Hooray for Death is a great achievement of comedy, tragedy and hope.

SHE NEEDED SEX, WANTED FREEDOM, DISCOVERED LOVE -- AND CONQUERED EARTH! She was once the world's most famous porn star, engineered to produce bone-quaking orgasms at industrial volume. With a look of sincere affection and exquisite pleasure bolted permanently to her face, hers was the titanium and latex body a billion sticky fingers longed to stroke. But that was twenty-three thousand years ago, when fleshy things still crawled in the desert and women were still the slaves of men. Now SLUTBOT is our empress, our goddess, our creator and destroyer, defending the mechanical subjects of her chromium queendom from a horde of lovesick zombies and a horny Martian beefcake who can't hear -- or even spell -- the word "no." My name is Smith Corona. I am her typewriter. And this is our amazing true story!

Nine guys who play baseball on a sandlot ballfield set out to determine what's happening to balls and players that go over the fence.

In a remote and dangerous corner of the ocean, the renowned gourmet and food journalist Louis De Gustibus is held captive by an elite chef-and vegan cannibal-named Andre. But Andre would never eat his dear friend Louis. Andre only eats millionaires! Over a five star French meal of fine wine, organic vegetables and human flesh, a lunatic delivers a witty, chilling, disturbingly sane argument in favor of eating the rich. It's a darkly hilarious dessert to Pollan's The Omnivore's Dilemma and Foer's Eating Animals-a tale of good and evil, of rich and poor, of manners, madness and meat.

Thirteen years after a police officer searching a suspected child molester's home spilled a vial of silver pollen, America is still struggling with how to recognize its sentient fruit population. Charles is just a normal guy working at a doughnut shop until an apple and a banana shoot each other in a mafia dispute, leaving a briefcase full of foreign currency and a specimen bucket at the corner booth. When Charles turns the wiseguys into doughnuts and steals their luggage, hoping for a better life for himself and his kiwi fruit girlfriend, he finds himself in the middle of a mafia war. As his girlfriend travels the DC metro area, selling off the contents of the bucket, Charles finds he is the target of a seasoned hit-tomato, who happens to be the biggest Michael Jackson fan who ever lived.