You don’t have to be Jewish to get back at the shmendriks* of the world Yiddish. It’s the most colorful language in the history of mankind. What other language gives you a whole dictionary of ways to tell someone to drop dead? That schmuck who got promoted over you? Meigulgl zol er vern in a henglaykhter, by tog zol er hengen, un by nakht zol er brenen. (He should be transformed into a chandelier, to hang by day and to burn by night.) That soccer mom kibitzing on her cell phone and tying up traffic? Shteyner zol zi hobn, nit keyn kinder. (She should have stones and not children.) If You Can’t Say Anything Nice, Say It in Yiddish is the perfect glossary of Yiddish insults and curses, from the short and sweet to the whole megillah (Khasene hobn zol er mit di malekh hamoves tokhter: He should marry the daughter of the Angel of Death.) Complete with hundreds of the most creative insults for the putzes** and kvetchers *** of the world, this is an indispensable guide for Jews and Gentiles alike. When it comes to cursing someone who sorely needs it, may you never be at a loss for words again. *Idiots **More idiots ***Complainer; a pain in the tuchas**** **** One’s rear end

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“The tongue is the pen of the heart/Di tsung iz der feder fun di hartz” and more sayings that sum up Jewish character and culture from generations past. Decade after decade, Yiddish proverbs continue to capture the humor, warmth, and traditions of Jewish life. Now, the beloved Yiddish Wisdom has been expanded with even more proverbs and fresh illustrations to be cherished by a new generation. With more than 150 folk sayings translated in Yiddish and English—from the whimsical and witty (Dress up a broom and it will also look nice/Az men batziert a bezem iz er oich shain) to the poignant (When one must, one can/Az me muz, ken men) and practical (When you look to the heights, hold on to your hat/Az du kukst oif hoicheh zachen, halt tsu dos hitl)—this treasured volume is the perfect gift for any celebration.

A cross between Henry Beard's Latin for All Occasions and Ben Schott's Schott's Original Miscellany, JUST SAY NU is a practical guide to using Yiddish words and expressions in day-to-day situations. Along with enough grammar to enable readers to put together a comprehensible sentence and avoid embarrassing mistakes, Wex also explains the five most useful Yiddish words–shoyn, nu, epes, takeh,and nebakh–what they mean, how and when to use them, and how they can be used to conduct an entire conversation without anybody ever suspecting that the reader doesn't have the vaguest idea of what anyone is actually saying. Readers will learn how to shmooze their way through such activities as meeting and greeting; eating and drinking; praising and finding fault; maintaining personal hygiene; going to the doctor; driving; parenting; getting horoscopes; committing crimes; going to singles bars; having sex; talking politics and talking trash. Now that Stephen Colbert, a Catholic from South Carolina and host of the "Colbert Report," is using Yiddish to wish viewers a bright and happy Chanukah, people have finally started to realize that there's nothing in the world that can't be improved by translating it into Yiddish. Wex's JUST SAY NU is the book that's going to show them how.

"Oy vey"--this is a primer like no other. In an inspired parodic twist, the two least Jewish characters in American literature spout some of the edgy, ironic Yiddishisms that have become part of the American vernacular. 35 full-color drawings.

A delightful excursion through the Yiddish language, the culture it defines and serves, and the fine art of complaint Throughout history, Jews around the world have had plenty of reasons to lament. And for a thousand years, they've had the perfect language for it. Rich in color, expressiveness, and complexity, Yiddish has proven incredibly useful and durable. Its wonderful phrases and idioms impeccably reflect the mind-set that has enabled the Jews of Europe to survive a millennium of unrelenting persecution . . . and enables them to kvetch about it! Michael Wex—professor, scholar, translator, novelist, and performer—takes a serious yet unceasingly fun and funny look at this remarkable kvetch-full tongue that has both shaped and has been shaped by those who speak it. Featuring chapters on curse words, food, sex, and even death, he allows his lively wit and scholarship to roam freely from Sholem Aleichem to Chaucer to Elvis. Perhaps only a khokhem be-layle (a fool, literally a "sage at night," when there's no one around to see) would care to pass up this endearing and enriching treasure trove of linguistics, sociology, history, and folklore—an intriguing appreciation of a unique and enduring language and an equally fascinating culture.

Next time you’re chattin’ with your khaverim (friends) and mishpukheh (family), bust out some Yiddish expressions that’ll liven up the conversation. Nothing is censored in Dirty Yiddish. It includes phrases for any situation, so readers have enough chutzpah (balls) to tell the local deli that they’ve waited long enough for their knish, and explicit swear words crude enough to shock Bubby and everyone else at the Passover seder. There’s even vulgar sex terminology so graphic it puts the outspoken Lower East Side princesses to shame. Bust out with expressions they never teach you in school, including cool slang, funny insults, explicit sex terms, and raw swear words. Dirty Yiddish teaches the casual expressions heard every day on the streets of New York . . . What’s up? Vos makhst du? Crazy bastard! Meshuggeneh momzer! I’m hammered. Ikh bin fershikkert. Don’t fuck with me! Bareh mikh nit! I have the shits. Ikh hob a shittern mogn. Lick my pussy. Lekh meyn lokh. Was it good for you? Tsufreedn?