This distinctive volume expands our understanding of couple resilience by identifying and exploring specific mechanisms unique to intimate relationships that facilitate positive adaptation to life challenges. Committed partnerships represent a unique form of relational alliance that offers an opportunity and challenge to go beyond the self - to develop as individuals and as a relationship. The contributors to this volume represent a range of perspectives that integrate conventional relationship science and innovative empirical and theoretical work on the importance of meaning-making, narrative construction, intersubjectivity, forgiveness, and positive emotion in couple life. The volume also offers a unique anchor point - ‘We-ness’ as it relates to the intersection between shared, personal identity and well-being. Under-examined relational contexts such as resilience among LGBT partners and sexual resilience during illness adds further refinement of thought and application.

Designed to be used as a companion to couple therapy, this book is based on a trailblazing study of over 1400 individuals. It presents over 75 techniques to help relationships thrive in the long-term and provides insights into the challenges faced by contemporary couples. Through in-depth interviews, this book takes pertinent questions from young couples and puts them to couples who have been together for decades. The time-tested secrets of thriving couples are presented in a new guise for a new generation. Capturing the effects of the COVID-19 pandemic, the study includes people from 52 countries and is the largest cross-sectional, multi-national study on long-term relationships to date. It highlights the dynamic and protective factors that lead to relationship longevity, as well as societal pressures, to guide therapists on how to manage these with their clients. The authors uncover how long-term relationships promote resilience, emotional, mental, and physical health, and protect against loneliness and harmful behaviours. Therapists and couples need to know what goes right in long-lasting relationships. Providing essential data and practical skills for psychologists, counsellors and other professionals, this book is a must-read for anyone working with couples to explore and understand what leads to resilient relationships in a harsh, complex world.

Challenging events occur in the lives of most couples, but when two therapists are confronted with what can only be described as a “tsunami” in their lives, bedlam and chaos could easily have set in. Instead, they reveal how they navigated through the challenges and transformed it into an opportunity for self-discovery and growth, independently and as a couple. This book addresses the enormous obstacles they faced from a personal perspective, but also contains the insights and practical advice learned from years as therapists, clinicians, educators, and marital partners. Unlike any other relationship handbook, the authors’ challenges are revealed from the unique perspective of personal thoughts and feelings, how they negotiated their dilemma and renegotiated the future, all told from the viewpoint of “He said,” “She said,” “We said,” and “Lessons Learned.” Readers will be offered a recipe for how couples can survive their own tsunamis—told with humor and poignant anecdotes. Once read, it will become the book couples repeatedly refer to when they hit the inevitable roadblocks that emerge throughout the life course, helping them to recapture the love and optimism of the first “I love you,” the proposal, and their wedding day!

#1 NEW YORK TIMES BEST SELLER • From authors of Lean In and Originals: a powerful, inspiring, and practical book about building resilience and moving forward after life’s inevitable setbacks After the sudden death of her husband, Sheryl Sandberg felt certain that she and her children would never feel pure joy again. “I was in ‘the void,’” she writes, “a vast emptiness that fills your heart and lungs and restricts your ability to think or even breathe.” Her friend Adam Grant, a psychologist at Wharton, told her there are concrete steps people can take to recover and rebound from life-shattering experiences. We are not born with a fixed amount of resilience. It is a muscle that everyone can build. Option B combines Sheryl’s personal insights with Adam’s eye-opening research on finding strength in the face of adversity. Beginning with the gut-wrenching moment when she finds her husband, Dave Goldberg, collapsed on a gym floor, Sheryl opens up her heart—and her journal—to describe the acute grief and isolation she felt in the wake of his death. But Option B goes beyond Sheryl’s loss to explore how a broad range of people have overcome hardships including illness, job loss, sexual assault, natural disasters, and the violence of war. Their stories reveal the capacity of the human spirit to persevere . . . and to rediscover joy. Resilience comes from deep within us and from support outside us. Even after the most devastating events, it is possible to grow by finding deeper meaning and gaining greater appreciation in our lives. Option B illuminates how to help others in crisis, develop compassion for ourselves, raise strong children, and create resilient families, communities, and workplaces. Many of these lessons can be applied to everyday struggles, allowing us to brave whatever lies ahead. Two weeks after losing her husband, Sheryl was preparing for a father-child activity. “I want Dave,” she cried. Her friend replied, “Option A is not available,” and then promised to help her make the most of Option B. We all live some form of Option B. This book will help us all make the most of it.

This book contributes to a better understanding of what makes people and communities resilient in the face of disasters, violence and terrorism. This resilience is understood as a resource that facilitates recovery, effective functioning and positive outcomes in the wake of major critical events that threaten the well-being of individuals, families, communities and nations. The chapters in this publication present complementary perspectives on resilience in a variety of socially adverse settings and how to assess resilience beyond the level of an individual. The contributing authors not only consider evidence of resilience in the aftermath of mass trauma, but uniquely explore it from a developmental perspective and expand the focus from individual resilience to the broader ecological levels of community and society. The book contains 11 chapters reflecting different aspects of resilience. Presentation of these different perspectives will be helpful to scholars and students of human behavior affected by life-threatening crises. Together, the chapters present up-to-date research that affirms human strength when confronted by the extreme experiences. The book also covers the broad landscape of current knowledge and research topics on resilience that are related to mass violence and terrorism, which is one of the growing concerns of the world today.

Positive Couple Therapy: Using We-Stories to Enhance Resilience is a significant step forward in the couple literature. Utilizing a strengths-based approach, it teaches therapists and couples a unique method for uncovering positive potential within a relationship. The authors demonstrate how “We stories”–created, recovered and made anew–provide essential elements of connection. With vivid imagery, these stories capture the couple’s sense of “We-ness,” highlighting memorable moments of compassion, acceptance, and respect. A shared commitment to the “We” simultaneously builds the relationship and enables each individual in the partnership to feel a greater degree of both accountability and autonomy. Couples that can find their stories, share them with each other, and then carry them forward to family, friends, and a larger community are likely to preserve a sense of mutuality that will thrive over a lifetime of partnership. Positive Couple Therapy provides simple and practical instruction for reclaiming positive stories that can catalyze hope in relationships that have become stressed and strained. The authors weave together cutting edge thinking and research in attachment theory, narrative therapy, neuroscience, and adult development, as well as their own research and clinical experience to present vivid case histories, step-by-step strategies, exercises, questionnaires, and interview techniques. They cover a range of contemporary couple experiences: couples in conflict, LGBT partnerships, deployed and discharged military couples, and couples at various points across the life span. The authors’ unique Me (to US) Scale, a 10-item tool that assesses the degree of mutuality a couple possesses at the start of treatment, gives therapists of any theoretical orientation the ability to put this intervention to immediate use.