Every kid's favorite subject: bathroom humor! Inside the Jokiest Joking Bathroom Joke Book Ever Written . . . No Joke! are over a thousand knee-slapping bathroom jokes for kids, along with hundreds of silly illustrations! How can you distinguish your dad’s poop from others? It’s really corny. Why did the turd never get anything done? Because he was pooped. What do you call a kid with a bad case of the runs? Down in the dumps. Hilarious and more!

Over 500 giggles, groans, and belly laughs! Kids can’t resist sharing jokes (even you try to stop them), so they always need a fresh supply. We’ve stuffed the pages of this little joke book with the funniest jokes we could find. Old favorites, new favorites, and a few festering stinkers, all guaranteed to make kids laugh out loud. You’ll find Q&A jokes, knock-knock jokes, riddles, and one-liners. And, of course, we’ve included entire chapters of those all-time kid-pleasers: elephant jokes, pirate jokes, and space jokes. Here’s a sampling: What's black and white, black and white, black and white? A penguin rolling down a hill. Why don’t zombies eat clowns? They taste funny. Why did the hen scold her chicks? They were using fowl language. What kind of books do skunks read? Best-smellers! How does Darth Vader like his toast? On the dark side. . . . and many more!

What did the poo say to the fart? You blow me away! Full to the brim with obscene one-liners, gross-out gags and smutty shenanigans, this book should be your number one – and number two – choice for lav-based laughs.

Jokes and riddles guaranteed to make you gag! Soon to be banned everywhere from Boston to the dinner table, this little book has a double helping of EEW-inducing fun. With more than 500 knock-knock jokes, one-liners, riddles, and puns to choose from, kids can always find the wrong joke…for the right occasion. How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it. What’s brown and sticky? A stick. What was Beethoven doing in his grave? Decomposing. Do zombies eat candy with their fingers? No, they eat the fingers separately.

"I am speechless. The Dirtiest Toilet Humor Book Ever is the most disgusting, crude book I have ever read. I am ashamed to say my son wrote this. Where did I go wrong?" -Mother of Author Michael Ryan, too embarrassed to give her name "I succeeded! It is clear that my superb parenting skills paid off. The Author, Michael Ryan, tells the A to Zs of shit taking. He demonstrates his expertise on the always funny material of the infamous #2." -Proud Father of Author Michael Ryan, who's wife wouldn't let him give his first name The Dirtiest Toilet Humor Book Ever was written for anyone who wants to laugh out loud about the topic of taking a crap. Author Michael Ryan displays his expertise on the often unspoken everyday experience of going to the bathroom. He dissects every imaginable issue from the toilet paper texture to the writings on the bathroom stall doors. A few of the many other topics covered are: types of doody, locations, bathroom spray, courtesy flush, the bidet, what to do while going to the bathroom, types of farts, clogging the bowl, activities, wiping (sitting vs. standing), diarrhea, hemorrhoids, girls, masturbation, constipation and public toilets in various countries.

All the looniest, wackiest, zaniest grossest jokes, games, puzzles and pranks a kid could ever want in one fun book! Uncle John is back with another For Kids Only masterpiece! Book of Fun is stuffed with wacky facts, gross-out jokes, goofy games, magic tricks, puzzling puzzles, and hilarious pranks. Easy-to-read stories and gags are brought to life with silly illustrations and fun fonts (which research suggests actually help kids build reading and comprehension skills). A sample of the fun to be had: * How to make your own whoopee cushion * Simple calculator tricks to amaze your friends * Classic riddles and mind-boggling brain teasers * Tongue twisters and word games * One-minute mysteries * Silly science tricks * Optical illusions * Lots of jokes . . . like this one: Q: Why do gorillas have big nostrils? A: Because they have big fingers. And much, much more!

"With universal appeal (everyone poops, after all), this witty, illustrated description of over two dozen dookies (each with a medical explanation written by a doctor) details what one can learn about health and well-being by studying what's in the bowl. A floater? It's probably due to a buildup of gas. Now think back on last night's dinner, a burrito perhaps? . . .All the greatest hits are here: The Log Jam, The Glass Shard, The Deja Poo, The Hanging Chad ... the list goes on. Sidebars, trivia, over 60 euphemisms for number 2, and unusual case histories all make this the ultimate bathroom reader. Who knew you could learn so much from your poo?"--Publisher website (October 2007)