How many times have you screamed "If you loved me, you'd stop " at your husband or son after a particularly nasty bout of drinking? How many times has your wife or sister promised to cut back--to drink only on special occasions? How many times has your heart been broken when this time turned out to be just like all the times before? If you are one of the nearly 80 million Americans affected by someone's drinking, this book is for you. Driven to make sense of her own 40+ years of experience coping with loved ones' drinking problems, Lisa Frederiksen found answers in the emerging brain research and scientific studies. What was missing was research that explained the family member's experience. What were they supposed to do, and what would happen to them if they didn't do it? First published in 2009 and still in demand today, "If You Loved Me, You'd Stop " was Frederiksen's first of six books dedicated to helping family members answer these kinds of questions. But a decade later, there is so much more to share. This updated version includes research advances that explain -- what it is about coping with a loved one's drinking that is so harmful to the family member's physical and emotional health and quality of life -- why alcoholism is a brain disease and what it takes to treat it and why alcoholism is different than alcohol abuse -- and what adverse childhood experiences, secondhand drinking, and toxic stress have to do with all of this. This 10th Anniversary Edition not only shares these important advances in comprehensible language, but it offers suggestions for helping yourself. Because no matter how much you love someone whose drinking affects your life, and no matter how much they love you back, love will not and cannot make them stop. The good news is that it's entirely possible for you to truly enjoy your life -- whether your loved one stops drinking or whether you continue your relationship with them, redefine it, or end it altogether. Additionally, this 10th Anniversary Edition can help those who struggle with a drinking problem understand what has happened to them and what they can do to change and/or treat it. It can also help family members whose loved ones have an opioid or other drug use disorder. Educators; treatment and medical professionals; family law practitioners; juvenile and criminal justice professionals; community, business, and public policy leaders and others whose work involves substance use disorders and their impacts on family members, co-workers, and the community-at-large can benefit from reading this book, as well.

"Living with a Functioning Alcoholic" is a book about hope, written specifically for women living in the chaos of alcoholic families yet unable to seek help from a psychologist.

This title says it all: When You Love a Functional Alcoholic, what is one to do? With good grace, a basis in the twelve-step program, and years of experience, Dr. William F. Kraft guides the reader through this most parlous journey-and back to wholeness and holiness and happiness. The book comprises thirty-three bite-size chapters-since it presumes readers are spending much of their time caring for (or bailing out) the alcoholic they love. Specific cases are described in particular, such as parents who live with teenaged alcoholics; children who have to care for elderly alcoholics; and what to do with that sometimes dry/sometimes even sober alcoholic who always seems to ultimately fall off the wagon. Making the book unique are the many stories of former patients, clients, and members of AA in their own words (anonymously, of course). These testimonies, which do not always end in a pot of gold, make not only for compelling (and sometimes heart-rending) reading, but also add a patina of authenticity to the book: if these people can learn to help the alcoholic they love, then perhaps you can too. Ultimately this is a book of acceptance, forgiveness, and love-all of which must begin with oneself. A bibliography completes the work. Book jacket.

Who is the typical alcoholic among the 12.5 million living in the United States now? Many, if not most of us when asked that question, would envision a skid row bum or someone at least out of work or with little education locked into a low-skill, low-paying job. But that is not accurate, according to the results of a national study released in June, 2007 by the National Institutes of Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism. The NIAAA determined that alcoholics in the United States really fall into five subtypes, including nearly 20 percent who are highly functional alcoholics, well-educated with good incomes. They include corporate presidents, powerful politicians, police, lawyers, doctors, scientists, and other highly-skilled, highly-educated people who are middle- to high-income and by most accounts successful. In this unprecedented book, mental health counselor Sarah Benton takes us into the worlds and minds of so-called high-functioning alcoholics, to understand how people so intelligent and achievement-oriented get drawn into states in which they secretly cannot control their liquor consumption but still manage to excel in their careers. The book includes a look at celebrity alcoholics like singer Eric Clapton and actor/comedian Robin Williams, as well as alcoholics in high positions including Chris Albrecht, former Chairman and CEO of HBO. Other high-profile people included in this book are Miss USA 2007 Tara Conner and football legend Joe Namath. With her own story of alcoholism and her recovery woven into the text, Benton takes us into the lives and challenges of these well-educated and successful people, seeking to understand how, when, and why they became addicted, as well as the reasons their alcoholism is, for most, so hard to admit, cope with, and recover from.

Lord Please Make Him Stop Drinking provides clear biblical examples of how wives can experience peace in their home from the up and down roller coaster of an alcoholic husband. Christine Folk, communications coach and founder of Epiphany Approach, has put her wisdom on the page in Lord Please Make Him Stop Drinking. Within its pages, Christine provides new skills for women to use when that angry alcoholic side of their husband shows up again. Lord Please Make Him Stop Drinking lays out a practical approach to applying God’s word to tumultuous situations and shows women how to: Resist being provoked into his argument ... again Speak to him in "his" language and get him to stop yelling Reduce the intensity and frequency of his rants Know what his real problem is Know exactly what God is trying to tell them

Are you feeling exasperated and helpless about your family member's addiction? Are you at your wit's end, having tried everything you can think of to make them stop? If someone you love is engaging in addictive behaviors such as alcohol and drug misuse, eating disorders, smoking, gambling, Internet addiction, sex addiction, compulsive overspending, or relationship addiction, you are undoubtedly experiencing unpredictability in your relationship. Some of the most common emotions you will experience include: - Guilt and shame - Anger and anxiety - Confusion and powerlessness Whether the addict in your life is your spouse, partner, parent, child, friend, or colleague, the key to changing this reality for yourself lies in shifting your focus from your loved one's addiction to you own self-care. This book presents a dramatically fresh approach to help you get off the roller-coaster chaos of addiction, maintain your own sanity and serenity, and live your best life.

The first general consumer book ever on the powerful, award-winning, scientifically proven new system of intervention that is turning the recovery field on its head. Historically there have been few options available for individuals seeking help for treatment-resistant loved ones suffering from substance abuse. Co-author Dr. Robert Meyers spent ten years developing a treatment program that helps concerned significant others bth improve the quality of their lives and learn how to make treatment an attractive option for their partners who are substance abusers. Get Your Loved One Sober describes this multi-faceted program that uses supportive, non-confrontational methods to engage substance abusers into treatment. Called Community Reinforcement and Family Training (CRAFT), the program uses scientifically validated behavioral principles to reduce the loved one's substance use and to encourage him or her to seek treatment. Equally important, CRAFT also helps loved ones reduce personal stress and introduce meaningful, new sources of satisfaction into their life. Key Features: --CRAFT is more effective than other types of interventions.This breakthrough new system is sweeping the recovery field. This is its first introduction to the general public. --Contains simple exercises readers can practice at their own pace, with no costly or heart-breaking interventions. --Proven successful for numerous addictions, not just alcoholism.